Tuesday, 4 March 2014

Waiting and Loving It!!! - Feat InTheMidstofHer and Hubster!

It's another Tuesday and I am just as excited as you are about today's feature on the Waiting and Loving It series!! First time here? You may have a clearer picture of the background to this series by reading the first feature HERE and also this post HERE

Today's feature is quite unique in that it is from a couple who prefer to be anonymous.. A lot of you are probably very familiar with this lovely blogger and I am really glad that she was very willing to be featured (Her first response after I contacted her about the idea of the series was - Sure! You know this is my bread and butter lol - you gotta love her!).. Without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, sit back, relax, enjoy and be blessed!

1. Hiya Inthe and Hubster! I must say that I am delighted/thrilled/excited to be able to feature you on this series! Thank you so much for agreeing to do this.. Please give us a little introduction to who you are:

Ayo! what a pleasure it is to be part of this movement. The Hubster and I are grateful!! Since I am the talker and he the thinker; I’ll be doing the talking for the both of us. For those reading, My name is Inthemidstofher, please call me “Inthe…” I am an anonymous blogger married to my man, my baby daddy, my who I fondly call "the Hubster”. We have been married a little over 4 years and we have a 3 yr old son I call “Baby boy”. I am a medical doctor and the hubster is a Sceintist

2. Super! Ladies and gentlemen, we have geniuses in the house! :-) ... Please tell us how you both met


Ha! Funny story. My best guy friend in medical school was the Hubster’s best friend in Uni; one day he told me; “Inthe, I have this best friend who I think you will be perfect for. Well, after a bus load of shakara on my side and bucket full of patience on his, we became a couple.

3. Lol @shakara... So, what would you say initially attracted you to each other?

I’ll be honest. My intentions for the hubster was to “use” him. Yes, you read that right. Use him, but in a different kind of way. When I first met him, I was still a baby Christian without many godly examples in my life. The hubster had been saved since he was a child so by the time we met; he had a strong solid head on his shoulders. He knew who he was and what he was called for; I admired that. My plan was to swoop in, suck some wisdom at his feet and hit the door. Uhm, guess again.


The more I knew him, the more I admired him and the more I admired, the more I was attracted to him. It didn’t help that he was also a tall glass of hotness! On his part, he liked my sense of humor and my thirst for God. I wasn’t the typical “SU” girl! I was able to laugh and love God at the same time. He also loved the fact that I love to cook; that trait complemented his dedication to eating…lol.

4. I love that! You had your plans, God had his.. Guess who won? lol.. Now, how did you know that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him?

After the hubster and I got to know each other, he made his intentions known. I mean he literally blurted out. “Hey Inthe, I am not hanging around you without cause or reason, I’m going to marry you someday” Ugh, stuff got real that day. Being with him as a friend was comfortable and safe because I knew he had no cruel intentions but the day he told me he wanted to be in a relationship with me with the intentions of marriage; I had to decide what I really wanted from him. This wasn’t a “ You’re cute, let's date and see where this goes” but a “ I’m going to marry you someday, if you’d let me.” Like I said, things got real…real fast! The ball was in my court. I told him to give me a week to think about it and I basically laid on my couch praying, searching the bible and seeking God’s face for an answer. I knew saying yes to the hubster was saying, “Yes” to forever. I did not believe in divorce and I was going to lay in whatever bed I was about to make.


In choosing the hubster, my standard was the 1st 3 Tim man. This was the scripture God outlined for the qualities he wanted in a church leader. I figured if these traits were good enough to govern God’s house, then it must be good enough to rule my heart. I placed the hubster beside this “ruler” and he PASSED with flying colors. To be honest, I was scared out of my mind but I trusted in God’s word. (Ayo, your readers can read more about making my decision in detail here

The process was easier for the hubster. He asked God if I was the one, God said “Yes” and the rest was history!

5. Wow.. that's amazing. I have read that blog post and I absolutely love it. Definitely one for every single girl to bookmark! Very brilliant. 
Next question, what made you make the decision to wait?

It was never a decision per se. Before I got saved, I remained a virgin because I didn’t think anyone was good enough for me. I held my body in high esteem but more out of pride than loving God. To be honest, I felt no one was good enough to get “this”. When I got saved, my perspective changed. I gave up dating and threw myself into trying to know God and growing spiritually. (Remember, that’s actually why I became friends with the hubster…lol) I was trying to surround myself with people who lived and reflected the word.


It was different for the hubster! He had been saved from childhood so he had already made his decision to wait waaaay before he even met me. It was a “take it or leave it” part of him; it wasn’t up to question or compromise.

6. That's great.. So I know it may not have been that easy or straightforward, please share with us what practical measures you took to ensure that you stuck by your decision?

There was TEAMWORK! We agreed we were going to wait and then we strived towards it. Unless you both agree on this, trouble lies ahead.

We were both students and in a long distance relationship till the day we married so that helped because we only got to see about every 4-6 weeks and holidays. Sometimes, I would need a quick fix and make an impromptu flight down but we were conscious of each other’s purse so we tried to remain structured. He had roommates; I had roommates so we were never alone. EVERYONE held us accountable!!


We were also careful with physicality. After I got saved, I had vowed that my next kiss would be at the altar (You should have seen the hubster’s face when I told him about this vow…hahaha. I thought he was going to cry!!! He got his first chance to taste my luscious lips as my husband) so there wasn’t any "making out” and all those heavy kissing sessions that might lead us astray were non existent. The “No Kissing" rule is not for everyone but it was definitely for us.

Team Work…Team Work….TEAMWORK!

7. LOL @Hubsters face.. I can imagine. Thank God it was worth the wait :-).
Now that you have crossed the line, what one advice would you give to your single self in preparation for marriage.


I would say, “ Inthe…, there is a time and season for everything! Guard your heart and spend your single years intentionally.

8. Fantastic.. Lastly, please describe in 3 words / sentences the best part of being married!


Love…family…fulfilling destiny!.

Once again, thank you sooo much InThe and Hubster for such an exciting feature and for blessing us with your story. InThe's blog is one that I have learnt soo much from! She has helped to build me up richly through her posts and I will definitely recommend that you visit, grab a comfortable position and try to go through ALL her posts! :-) and follow her on twitter @inthemidstofher

Something I took away from this and definitely agree with is the fact that she mentioned TEAMWORK as a key to making it work.. You both have to be on the same page, talk about it, share your dreams and visions so that you are both singing from the same sheet. Purposely determine boundaries and practical ways to help each other. It's possible by God's grace.

"Can two walk together unless they are agreed?" Amos 3:3

Don't forget, you can email me directly at with any question, and also if you would like to be featured on this series. Also follow on twitter @1plustheone .. Thanks! xxx


  1. Absolutely lovely from start to finish!
    Such an encouragement to read. You write so honestly and with such warmth, one just gets sucked in picking the nuggets along the way. Thanks for sharing 'In The'. God bless you, the Hubster and your lovely son.

  2. Yo yo yo
    My mainest chic Inthe...
    Looooooool at USE him. Guess God ended up using both of you...
    I recall my first time on her blog. That day at work (Forgive me my employers) but I did NOTHING else looool.
    I didn't rest till I had read everything she wrote. Then ever so often I am there reading and re-reading. Dripping with wisdom. Everypost esp since she started talking more relationship.
    And yes teamwork!!! Once both of you are playing for the sane NO SEX team, the game is already won.
    I like how self pride was what held you back from giving 'this' out. I wish more unsaved girls had even more self respect.
    Tho I had been saved from young, I was actually HELLA SCARED of the pain associated with losing my virginity. As my love walk improved, I realised that love for God and obedience to His Word should be my motivation to live right and NOT fear.
    Different strokes, different folks, SAME GOD
    Well done nne m. You and your blog are such an inspiration.
    God bless you my darling.
    Love love love
    And love to you my darling Ayo...

  3. You are so right Eloxie! I felt the same way reading as well.. . As with all the featured guests, I could very well relate with it - real and very down-to-earth.. God bless you InThe xxxx

  4. @E, 2 thumbs up.. I share your sentiments! I wonder how much time I have spent on her blog reading and re-reading her posts.. Too much wisdom!
    And you are soo right.. At first it was pride, then fear and now it is just love and honour to God!
    *kisses* to you my Fably FAB E! xxxx

  5. *Blush*... Thank you all for the love and encouragement!! I am truly blessed!!!

  6. Yes, Teamwork. Nothing is accomplished in a relationship without teamwork. I also loved how you used him too. Smart chic. Your posts have been a blessing to me. Your hubster is a true gift. God bless your home.
    Ayo, I love all the pictures you used. So apt.

  7. I love Inthemidstofher's blog and this interview is really good.

  8. I was rushing here to think I would see her pictures *side eye* You can tell she will be beautiful.. I digress.

    I am on the "No kiss till the alter" Its good to know that its possible, I thought i was way in over my head because there is no man now but... Oluwa Ese fun encouragement!!

    I LOVE Inthe... and Thanks for sharing your heart here again :) :) :)

  9. Hmm this post is full of nutrients and fiber to help you stay full. Lol

    Curious, is that Inthe, hubby, and junior in the pictures?

    Okay back to the post. I lol'ed all the way till I pinched myself to be serious. Then I noticed why: as soon as I read that she wanted to "use" him, subconsciously I approved, saying "ah, my kind of woman." LOL

    I pray God keeps you guys' love from going stale.

  10. Aww, I enjoyed reading this!

  11. Hiya Nikkysho! Thanks a lot xx

  12. @InThe.. Totally deserved and more.. Thank you for being a huge blessing xx
    @Anosi.. You should know InThe's signature pictures.. I wish I could take credit but it's all her! Makes the interview come alive! xx
    @'Lara, thanks a lot hun xx
    @Tommie. Lol, sorry to disappoint - Maybe we should send a memo to Inthe, yes? I agree with you. I'm on that 'No Kissing' plan and I am so grateful to know thatthey are role models!
    @Maggielola, AMEN! I can just tell that InThe is a fun/bubbly/lively/real person and it added a lot of character to the interview whil still passing some very deep messages! xx

  13. As most have said, I am a big fan of in the as well. First time I went on her blog, I was on it for hours, scrolling through previous posts! Such wisdom from her post
    I am in love with this series oneplustheone!!! It is lovely to see that different couples are waiting before marriage and it is not an "old-school" thing!! It is also inspiring to see the different takes on waiting by the couples
    In the midst thank you for your honesty and I pray God causes your marriage to grow sweeter and sweeter with each passing year

  14. Beautiful Words and really inspiring. I love this series. Thanks Inthe and Ayo for putting this together, we have been blessed.

  15. Ah! E wa’ye mi lode! I am overwhelmed! Praise God for his goodness. I just want you ladies to remember that God writes the loveliest of love stories. I don’t care where you’ve been or how many people you’ve been with in the past. Every day is a chance to begin again. Love yourself first and foremost and realize you are the apple of your father’s eye!!

  16. in the!!!!!! thanks sooo much for doing this, you are one of the women I use as reference in my prayers for my future home..i tap into it everytime. God bless ur home greatly and continue to use u for great works..
    Ayo!!!! I jst want to hug you for getting in the to do this interview. greater grace dear

  17. One of my fav bloggers, yay! Lovely feature, I enjoyed it, and learned a lot too.

  18. @Anonymous, AMEN to your prayers.. Thank you very much for your comment. And you're right.. Waiting is definitely not old school.. I am grateful to all those who have agreed to speak out! :-) xx
    @Hannah, I am glad you have been blessed. Thank God xx
    @InThe, Lol.. There's no doubt that you have been a huge blessing to so many people1 May God continue to use you to do greater things!
    @Frances, May you have a blessed home indeed and some day, you will be telling your story too and others will be taking notes.. *Big hug* right back xx
    @MW, Yayy! I am glad you enjoyed reading! That's a great compliment to InThe - From one great blogger to another xx

  19. They sound like a lovely couple! First visit and I'll make sure I catch up on your blog over break.

  20. Thanks a lot Naija Sisters.. Welcome! And thanks for stopping by..Really enjoyed reading your blog xx

  21. Lovely interview...In the is one enjoyable writer!

  22. Yup! Love inthe... I read all her posts the first time I went to her blog also... I think every married woman and to be married women need to read her post on 'being doublefaced' or something like that... too much wisdom and insight in that.

    Love you also 1+the one...

  23. Thanks a lot @Anonymous.. You're right, I second that recommendation! xx

  24. so Inspiring and not the usual bore you get from couples that stay chaste! you can see that she is fun! i just culled my yardstick for a husband from u, yeah 1Tim 3 man all the way! i had read that scriptures severally , but not its my measure for the man i shall marry. Thanks Inthe.


  25. Kz, thanks a lot for your comment! Inthe's story is very real, practical and exciting! It shows that God Himself is the creator of romance :-) xx


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