Tuesday 26 May 2009

Memoirs of an ageing Young-y

I have blogged so many times in my head... If only there was ever such a thing as "mental" blogging... fantastica! As I go about my day I see or notice something that I think "Oh I definately need to blog about that" Infact, I already start with the intro and all but sadly that's where it all ends...

Unfortunately this is true about some ideas/dreams that we have - They start and end in our minds.. ...
If only we could buy and sell/trade/engage in business/write novels/talk to that person/say I'm sorry/say I Love you, in and through our minds.. How wonderful would that be!

My body feels as though it has been dragged through a grinding mill, why? well beacuse I jumped and threw my hands in the air -a la concert style- for all of about 30mins yesterday... I was saying to my friends, "Oh my, I think I'm getting old! (or maybe just plain unfit)" In the past, I was usually called to be at the fore-front of such craziness and I gleefully led such (excruciating) aerobics display but this time 'round, a younger (and more fit/lithe/slim) individual was asked to lead the jumping and flaying of hands!

I didn't feel bad/neglected about it but it made me realise a few home-truths:

1. There's always going to be a younger person
2. I would not be young forever
3. Enjoy your glory days for no matter how much you think they would last forever something always happens - AGE, that's what! (Ask Elizabeth Taylor {sadly, I even had to google her to remember her last name})
4. Achieve as much as you can today, tomorrow do even more and next week, break all past personal records.

This is not to scare, frighten or make you hate growing up, rather I hope it makes you appreciate today more, the drive, energy and strength you have at each stage of your life.. for it's there for a purpose - to be used in the measure it's been given. As a youngster remember to dance hard, play hard, laugh hard, work hard, pray hard, serve God hard, pursue and work towards your dream hard... In doing that, you lay for yourself a foundation to ensure that there wouldn't be room for regrets and "what ifs" later in life... Enjoy every moment and stage as it ought to be..

So that when you are 60 and you see a teenager dancing like there's no tomorrow, you would only smile and say.. "allow him/her it's their time, I remember when I was his/her age.." without any bitterness or grudge...

So that when you are 75, you can proudly look back on your achievements and fruits of your hard work.

So that when you are 90 you can be celebrated by the world and the youngsters strive to display their energy before you (Ask Nelson Mandela {I didn't have to google him :-)

God bless xx

Sunday 24 May 2009

Daddy's Angry Again

Daddy's angry again.
He's shouting and screaming
Using bad words
I didn't do anything
No, nothing major
I only asked for money for fees
He hates when I come with these requests
They seem to get to him so
Not that he doesn't love me
No, no he does
So very much
Then why is he so upset at me?
I didn't impose the fees
If I had my way there wouldn't be any
Maybe I should keep quiet
But then I would be kicked out of school
Then he would be MADDDD
Maybe I should wait longer
But then it would leave him less time to source for the money
He would still be MADD
Why did we become poor?
Daddy is a good man
Hardworking and honest
Loyal and faithful
Loves and obeys God
Why did things become so tough
Why is he angry at the mention of money?
When would we be rich again?
When would money not be a problem?
Why is the world so unfair?

But like Psalm 126 v 5-6
I will wait
I have to wait
I can only wait

(For all those in the "waiting" period - whatever it may be, marriage, money, child, success, school, health - God will surely come through for you, He hasn't forgotten you. Although it seems as if the wait would never end.. remember "even if your father and your mother forsake you He would not leave you" (Psalm 91v10) Hold on, hold on, hold on.... Don't be discouraged He loves you more than you know. After crying all night, your joy would come in the morning...

If nothing else, remember: God loves you sooooo much!

Wednesday 13 May 2009

Something (NOT) for the Examination Hall


Well, since I am not quite able to put up a post, I thought I might as well leave for you good people of blogville something to laugh about. In honour of the fact that a lot of people are in the middle of exams/assessments/courseworks, here are some recommendations for "What to do in an exam hall if you don't know any answer to the questions asked" culled from this facebook group

Disclaimer* Please do not try this at home... If you do, you will have only yourself to blame! lol


1. Get a copy of the exam, run out screaming "Andre, Andre, I've got the secret documents!!"

2. Talk the entire way through the exam. Read questions aloud, debate your answers with yourself out loud. If asked to stop, yell out, "I'm SOOO sure that you can hear me thinking." Then start talking about what a jerk the instructor is.

3. Bring a Game Boy. Play with the volume at max level.

4. On the answer sheet find a new, interesting way to refuse to answer every question. For example: I refuse to answer this question on the grounds that it conflicts with my religious beliefs. Be creative.

5. Run into the exam room looking about frantically. Breathe a sigh of relief. Go to the instructor, say "They've found me, I have to leave the country" and run off.

6. 15 min. into the exam, stand up, rip up all the papers into very small pieces, throw them into the air and yell out "Merry Christmas." If you're really daring, ask for another copy of the exam. Say you lost the first one. Repeat this process every 15 min.

7. Come into the exam wearing slippers, a bathrobe, a towel on your head, and nothing else.

8. Be as vulgar as possible during the exam, make sure every sentence has every other word as a swear word or some sexual innuendo for example.

9. Bring things to throw at the instructor when s/he's not looking. Blame it on the person nearest to you.

10. As soon as the instructor hands you the exam, eat it.

11. Every 5 min. stand up, collect all your things, move to another seat, continue with the exam.

12. Turn in the exam approx. 30 min. into it. As you walk out, start commenting on how easy it was.

13. Get the exam. 20 min into it, throw your papers down violently, scream out "Fuck this!" and walk out triumphantly.

14. Arrange a protest before the exam starts (ie. Threaten the instructor that whether or not everyone's done, they are all leaving after one hour to go drink.)

15. Show up completely drunk (completely drunk means at some point during the exam, you should start crying for mommy).

16. Comment on how sexy the instructor is looking that day.

17. Come to the exam wearing a black cloak. After about 30 min, put on a white mask and start yelling "I'm here, the phantom of the opera" until they drag you away.

18. If the exam is math/sciences related, make up the longest proofs you could possible think of. Get pi and imaginary numbers into most equations. If it is a written exam, relate everything to your own life story.

19. Try to get people in the room to do a wave.

20. Bring some large, cumbersome, ugly idol. Put it right next to you. Pray to it often. Consider a small sacrifice.

21. During the exam, take apart everything around you. Desks, chairs, anything you can reach.

22. Puke into your exam booklet. Hand it in. Leave.

23. Take 6 packages of rice cakes to the exam. Stuff at least 2 rice cakes into your mouth at once. Chew, then cough. Repeat if necessary.

24. Walk in, get the exam, sit down. About 5 min into it, loudly say to the instructor, "I don't understand ANY of this. I've been to every lecture all semester long! What's the deal? And who the hell are you? Where's the regular guy?"

25. Do the entire exam in another language. If you don't know one, make one up!

26. Bring a black marker. Return the exam with all questions and answers completely blacked out.

27. Every now and then, clap twice rapidly. If the instructor asks why, tell him/her in a very derogatory tone, "the light bulb that goes on above my head when I get an idea is hooked up to a clapper. DUH!"

28. From the moment the exam begins, hum the theme to Jeopardy. Ignore the instructor's requests for you to stop. When they finally get you to leave one way or another, begin whistling the theme to the Bridge on the River Kwai.

29. After you get the exam, call the instructor over, point to any question, ask for the answer. Try to work it out of him/her.

30. Bring cheat sheets FOR ANOTHER CLASS (make sure this is obvious... like history notes for a calculus exam... otherwise you're not just failing, you're getting kicked out too) and staple them to the exam, with the comment "Please use the attached notes for references as you see fit."

31. Fake an orgasm. When interrupted, apologize, and explain that question #__ moved you, deeply

32. Wear a superman outfit under your normal clothes. 30 minutes into the exam, jump up and answer your phone, shouting "What? I'm on my way!!". rip off your outer clothes and run out of the room. strike a pose first for added effect.

33. Upon receiving the exam, look it over, while laughing loudly, say "you don't really expect me to waste my time on this drivel? Days of our Lives is on!!!"

34. Get deliveries of candy, flowers, balloons, telegrams, etc. . . sent to you every few minutes throughout the exam.

35. In the middle of the exam stand up and yell 'they’re coming for me!' and run out.

......And my advice?? If you don't know any of the answers to the questions, please bend your head low and pray like your life depended on it.. (Well that may actually well be the case hehe)

God bless xx

Friday 8 May 2009

Allow me to Introduce (2).....

In the spirit of introducing and also supporting the wonderful bloggers that are BSNC and Miss FlyHigh, here's the hottest thing to hit blogville *drum-roll please*

It's a new blog recently launched by a trio of beautiful and articualate ladies MissFlyHigh, Brown Skin Naija Chic aka BSNC and Bibi..

It's only just started and has an audio welcome/introduction post but judging from the team's individual blogs, you are in for a treat!

Check it out/include in your blogroll and "firsssssst" it as much as possible lol

Good job ladies!

God bless xx

Thursday 7 May 2009

Allow Me To Introduce......


I was just going through some of my group pages on facebook (yeah I do that :-) when I saw a link that led me to, and introduced me to this lovely lovely Nigerian singer... I can't believe I am just hearing about her and hearing the song.. I'm sure many people have already heard the song but it's new to me and I am sooo loving it..

Allow me to introduce (or re-introduce as the case may be) this beautiful, immensely talented, lively, spirited young lady, from the blessed country that is Nigeria in the coast of West Africa...*drum-roll please* JAHDIEL!

Like I said, I don't really know a lot about her, only what I see from her music videos (lame, I know) but she has such a likeable personality :-)... I would definitely look out for her and bring you more info if I get any.. (I know, I know and you are welcome :-)

I have only been opportuned to listen to 2 of this songstress/minister's songs and they are Heritage and Eloheeka. The former is my favourite of the two but I assure you that they are both worth a listen.... As usual, when I "discover" a new song, it goes on repeat on my laptop....((I play and play until I wear myself out with it, hehe)

Her voice is sonorous and the rhythm infectious... very easy to love.. If you liked "wellu wellu" from Sammie Okposo or "Woekilemo" by Asu Ekiye you would fall in love with Heritage. If your taste is more upbeat/soft rock a la RoofTop MCs then Eloheeka would be your thing.

I will try to upload the video (I need lessons!) but if not, listen to Heritage HERE and Eloheeka

p.s Oh wow... My very first blog miracle!! I learnt how to put a video up and it's really as easy as ABC (Ignorance truly is a disease...:-)

God bless xx

Monday 4 May 2009


Oh I have been so bad at updating this blog....
Whatever happened to my resolution??
I refuse to slack.. no way! :-)
I haven't neglected my blog rounds though, blogs can be oh so addictive...

What would you do if your sister's husband started making advances at you??
My friend was in this kind of situation and she was soo upset about it (putting it mildly). As with many African families, it's not new for one to house his/her sibling, my friend (let's call her Suzy) was leaving with her sister, sister's husband and kids. Everything was peachy and everyone got along so well - she and the sis' hussy were quite close in the older brother/sister kinda way, she and sis had a loving relationship and she loved the kids like her own.

Unfortunately, recently hussy starts to act up and "mistakenly" brush past her in the corridor, make references to her "endowments" and how lucky her husband would be and blah.. The thing is she didn't know how to tell her sis cause she knew it would totally crush her and may affect her marriage (bear in mind, that hussy treated her sis really well and they seemed to have something good going on, they were both Christians as well). She couldn't tell their parents either cause she knew it would spoil the good relationship they had as in-laws, she couldn't speak to people cause she was just embarrassed about the whole thing!

Eventually she had to speak about it to her sis who of course didn't take it so well and refused to believe it, she confided in her mum who was naturally upset at the whole thing but begged her to keep from letting their father know as he would go ballistic.
Sis confronts hussy, he vehemently denies it and Suzy feels even worse and like a home-wrecker but then she had to say it as it was getting out of hand and she respected both sis and hussy too much to keep quiet about it....

Thinking about it, what would I do in that position (God forbid) but truly it could happen to anyone, be it brother-in-law, uncle-in-law, step father, friend's husband etc.. What would make it difficult would be if you all had a good rapport and things had to change as a result... Why do men go after such close relatives even if they want to stray?

My thoughts are that sometimes, it's not about the guys being promiscuous, it's more about the opportunity presenting itself (don't get me wrong, I don't for one moment excuse the men as they are at fault) but, imagine a young (beautiful) woman in the house, who cooks your meals, takes care of your children and home, is there to listen to you without the judging looks/tones of your wife, who respects you.... all the things your wife does, only thing is she's not sharing your bed... Attraction would certainly build and proximity breeds "unholy" fondness..

It's good to be a custodian to relatives and so on, furthermore, it's good to have them around to help/keep company... but hmm sometimes it's hard for guys not to get drawn to ladies they see/smell/breathe on a daily basis...
Please guys hold yourselves, not everything desirable is a must have, communicate openly with your other half, control your desires and like the bible says, "let every man possess his vessel" not the vessel possessing the man....

God bless xxxx