This post is loonngggggg due! And it was re-inspired/'re-gingered' by this POST written by one of my blog favourites Inthemidstofher.com!
She was responding to a question about sex before marriage and something she mentioned struck me and reminded me of a 'project' I'd wanted to undertake for a while..
For many friends of this blog, you would know that I am proudly and unashamedly Team V! Don't know what Team V stands for? Well it's a term that I got introduced to by InThe in one of her comments on a post I wrote previously..
Team V simply means Team Virgin aka Team Virgin 'r' Us, aka Team no sex before marriage by God's grace aka Team saving it till he puts a ring on it aka Team staying celibate to honour God's word aka Team only by grace can I ever achieve it!
Now, I don't write smugly - not at all (who born?).. I don't write because I feel I have superior will-power that has enabled me to abstain throughout the years! I write cause I want to stand to be counted as one who says - it's by no means easy, but very possible (for both men and women!) by God's GRACE.. Is it easy you ask? Capital NO.. Infact, I dare say it's easier to give in to the whole hype of 'Sex - Everyone is doing it,Pick a Partner today' than to say:
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Everyday sex is thrust in my face through different means and channels.. Both overtly and through innuendos.. People are too happy to share their latest sexual escapades and new adventurous styles.. I sit and listen like a 'foolish' virgin to the 'wsidom' spewed by experienced friends at some bridal showers, reunions etc and I have to admit that it's usually 'safe' to siddon and look rather than tell them the beauty I have experienced in waiting..
Now, when I say beauty, don't get me wrong.. It can be toughhh! I talk to a guy who I totally fancy and I know how my body reacts! (Girls are moved by words afterall).. I read a book or watch a movie and all they have to do is kiss and I know that I'm like "Father can you hear me??!" But has it been worth it? YUP..
It gives me more pleasure to know that I am not compromising my precious relationship with God.. I can do a LOT for it including saying no to pre-marital sex.. It has helped me get over break-ups easier because I know that I haven't left a part of me with him or him with me.. I leave without a 'keepsake'. Then of course, let's not forget the plethora of STDs that I avoid .. And it goes on and on! (I will share in subsequent posts)..
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Anyways, the whole koko of the post is that the silence of people who have chosen to wait can be deafening.. It almost seems like we see it as a 'burden' rather than a gift.. To be quite frank, if we were meant to be shining the light or salting the earth, we are not trying much.. It seems that the candle of pre-marital sex is outshining the bright lamp of (glorious) sex in the context of marriage..
I will be doing more posts on this and hopefully showing how wonderfully possible and incredibly beautiful saying no to sex before marriage is!
So wanna join Team V?? Excellente! It's not too late xxxx
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Love!...Love!!....Love this!!! Gbam! Nothing else to say. #Team Unashamed
ReplyDeleteThanks my sis of life! Post dedicated to you! #Team Unashamed #Team V #Team Boom! Hehehe xxx
ReplyDeleteGood
ReplyDeleteGod bless you
I love this
I've come this far not cos I didn't have raging hormones or they weren't screaming for attention rather its been the Grace of God. Has it been hard? Most def, but for everytime I chose God above my feelings I knew He was smiling down at me. May we continue to rest in His strength in the midst of our fleshy weakness. Great piece.
ReplyDeleteTeam V for the win EVERYTIME!!! Proudly standing with you as an alumni of this esteemed association =)
ReplyDeletewhat if I abstain from sex, I meet a guy and we date and no sex involved. Get married and find out he's not good in bed, or his penis is small, or he has some dysfunction in that area. How does one handle such for the rest of her life ?.
ReplyDeleteI believe we should all stay pure before marriage but I ask myself these questions.. what if that happens to me ?
Although even if I date a guy, have great sexual chemistry and we end up breaking up and same thing happens to the next relationship and the next relationship and my body count hits the roof ..
This to me is very confusing. just like my crazy cuz says, you test drive a car before buying so why will I not find out if a guy I plan to spend my life with isn't slacking in that department ?
what do you think please
@Anonymous…I feel you. I truly do! I wrote a post about this. Check this out esp #6..
ReplyDeletehttp://www.inthemidstofher.com/2012/05/sex-is-not.html
Plus babe… please forgive me if I crossed any lines. Not tryna promote my bog on your blog.
Team V,now everyone should be jumping on this train,its where the real ish lies.
ReplyDeleteThanks 1+the one,God's grace is sufficient,not easy but do-able....
:) and may the good Lord strengthen you till the end
ReplyDeleteContrary to what many people think, there are still virgins out there. Not everyone is 'doing it'.
ReplyDeleteProudly Team V.
Thank you everyone for your comments! Like everyone has said, it's not easy but doable by God's grace..
ReplyDelete@Anonymous... I think a full post is required for your questions. Thank you very much for asking.. It's better to be open and honest about issues.. That's a sure way to getting answers - true answers!
InThe has already sent in her response (Thanks hun, you're an absolute star!)..
If there are more questions, please write in again.. I can't promise to have the answers but I know wonderfully wise people who can.. Don't forget, someone may have asked exactly the same thing and gotten an answer for it so.. don't stop asking! xx
Another alumni here. team V for the win!
ReplyDeleteE ku ise.........please shout it loud and proud.......it's worth every bit of the wait......hopefully, one day it will take a voice of its own just as #team natural hair has taken base in naija .
ReplyDeleteMadamm Toinlicious has given you her winning for this week. Please, send your phone network to hattylolla@yahoo.com, so I can send you your voucher.
ReplyDelete@aloted.. yes ma'am! God bless you xx
ReplyDelete@sykik.. That would be so cool!! Amen!
@ilola, she did?!! Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Let me go and look for her on twitter.. I will DM my phone number too! Thanks thanks thanks! You made my day :-D *singing* tra-la-la-la-la.. Toin loves me, tra-la-la-la-la, she gave me her credit! :-D xxxx
Thanks for the weekly gifts @ilola.. God bless you! I look forward to Monday earnestly to see if I can finally guess right! lol xxxx
awww :) it is not by power lol
ReplyDeleteProudly Team V here! Whooop!!
ReplyDeleteLight shines in d darkness and darkness can not overcome the light.
ReplyDeleteSo proud of all d work u r doing. Keep talking about it and walking the walk so the world will know that like Daniel , there are people who have refused to feed on the deception from the media.
I pray for increased grace in ur ministry.
Big hug
Whoop!!!
ReplyDeleteTeam V for the MONEY yo!!!
Whether Primary V or now committed secondary V...
I love how you ended it especially. So that others know they have a chance too..
See you sooooooooooooooooooonnnnnnn
Inthe :p
I hope you see this Inthe...
E'
www.eziaha.com
E: I see it oooh….well done!
ReplyDeleteMy dear ur post has more than said it all! I practically have nothing more to add. But seriously like u said, it sometimes starts to seem more like a burden than a gift. Hearing other ppl championing the cause of premarital sex and one is thinking, "is waiting really worth it?" We hear all sorts of things like, "If u don't do it now you will become frigid when ur ready to do it!"
ReplyDelete"Do it with an unknown person and get it over with."
Some guys u really really like may leave u as soon as he hears that ur Team V (at least I've had such an experience before). One even said, "Are we supposed to applaud u for that? Double lol...and I said to myself, "Thank God I dodged a bullet with that one!
Good job tho. Young girls need to know this cos after u pop the cookie jar that's all there is to it.
concerning the "test drive" comment, all i have to say is... Hunny, but you are NOT a car!
ReplyDeleteLOL.. Word!
ReplyDeleteJust read this today and I love it! Proudly team V, first time I am declaring that in public. It is by God's grace that I have made it this far as you say it isn't easy.
ReplyDeleteHeyyyyy! lol.
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment hun.. More of God's grace.. Not easy but worth it! *kisses*
Interesting :)
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