2015 with 1 + The One! *New Video Post (VLog)!! *Grow in God, Grow in Love; Be the Best*

Hello everyone!

I am excited to bring you the first Video Post of 2015 - Yayyy!



We hope to do many more this year by God's grace! The ministry is moving to the permanent site :-D

For those who might not be able to watch, here's the summary of the post:

The theme for 1 + The One in 2015 is

'Grow in God, Grow in Love; Be the Best!'

If you recall, the theme for last year was Building Relationships and we thank God for what He did throughout the year! We have cause to give Him glory!!

Thank you to everyone who was a part of 1 + The One in 2014, it was great meeting and connecting with such wonderful people!

Thank you to everyone who celebrated with me on my birthday last week - to say I was overwhelmed is an understatement.. I felt so much love and I can only thank God for the wonderful people that I meet on a daily basis. May God cause you to be celebrated far beyond your imaginations this year in Jesus name. I love and appreciate you sincerely!

One of the most heart-warming messages/gifts I received came all the way from Germany via Youtube and I was just short of words when I watched it.. God bless you Sabba Sabba, Ola and Austin.. May God reward you immensely. May you be celebrated in Jesus name.. If you'd like to see the video, please click the link below:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qExhevzcVC0&feature=share

Right, ladies and gentlemen, it's 2015! I am excited.. Hope you are too? :-) xxxx

A love-ing YOU - 2014!

Hello everyone!

Like I mentioned in my previous post HERE, the theme for this blog in 2014 is BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS!

As an individual, I am passionate about seeing relationships flourish.. Not just romantic ones but even platonic relationships too.. I am interested in the art of improving the way we relate with one another as human beings.. and in particular, this topic is dear to my heart as a Christian - because God says we must love Him (relationship) and love others as we love ourselves (more relationship)!

I have discovered that building relationships starts with building one's self.. Yes, it starts with YOU! - In some instances, you would need to change YOUR thinking, YOUR reaction and improve the way YOU relate and communicate with people.. It's not easy at all but one thing I know for sure is that it's WORTH IT!

So ladies and gentlemen, let's do this! May God give us the grace to be better spouses, children, parents, siblings, relatives, friends! And above all, may it give God pleasure :-)

Lots of love people xxxx

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Today and always xxxx

PS Apologies for not fulfilling my promise of starting the new series last week! Things happened and now my access to the internet is very limited (temporary though).. I will start this month by God's grace.. Thank you for your forgiveness and understanding *wink* xx

It's a new day, it's a new month, it's a NEW YEAR!

Happy and blessed 2014 my darling darling blog community! May God bless you immensely!

It feels GOOOOOD to be back :-D

Thanks to all those who left a comment here and via twitter @1plustheone. I gat too much love for you all! You make life extra extra beautiful! *smiles*

Hope your new year has started on a great note? 2014 feels like is going to be a GREAT year!

The theme for the blog this year is BUILDING RELATIONSHIPS! With God, significant other, family, friends and basically everyone around us! It would be exciting and enlightening by God's grace woohooo!!

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So get ready folks, it's about to get all kinds of great here!

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PS, something new coming up tomorrow!! Stay tuned.

Love you, God bless you xxxx

Scandal me no more

I don't watch many series apart from the days of Desperate Housewives *big grin*, a bit of One Tree Hill.. I get bored with them easily. I remember my ex trying to get me into Eastenders and Corrie.. what?! I watched the former's Christmas episode to show my committed committment to him but err I still didn't quite gerrit!

Ok, so a few months back, I was introduced to this uber fascinating series and I got very very into it! Like I spent the whole day watching it and just wanted to clap with glee at the sheer thrill of it all! And one of the most exciting thing was that the lead was female *whoop whoop*... To be honest, I wouldn't have minded being Olivia Pope for one day.. I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.. Scandal!

Yup, I dedicated a whole Saturday to exploring the exhilirating exhiliration of Scandal - Olivia Pope, the President, their affair, the first lady and the next 'issue' to be taken care of.. 

Now, I think it must have been around evening time when I had been sufficiently saturated with Scandal that I had that niggling nudge in my mind (Don't you just hate when that happens).. I knew there was something not quite right when I couldn't wait for the next Fitz and Olivia 'moment'.. Oh how I started to get quite irritated with Mellie and her meddling and interrupting ways.. Even when she was pregnant.. Like so? Are you the first wife to be pregnant for your husband who is spending time, quality time with his much more interesting mistress?! Can you just chill a little so that they can bask in the illicit-ness of their affair and the joy of not ever wanting to live without the other.. IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK A WIFE??!

Yup, I knew there was problem.. I had to take a chill pill! 

I am a Christian, I know what my values and principles are, yet here I was rationalising in my mind the reason why Fitz just had to keep on carrying on with his mistress! It was Mellie's fault after all (too cold-hearted, too manipulating). It's Olivia he really wants to be with and we know that if he weren't President I would find him a divorce lawyer in a flash! Lol..

I know it's just a TV series, "One calm right down!" But... The bible says 'Above all else, guard your heart for everything you do flows from it'..

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It's harmless really but I know the truth about 'fleeing from every appearance of evil (anything that looks like or dare I add makes what is wrong look pleasantly appealing).

A while ago, I made a decision to guard jealously what I allow enter into my mind and soul through my eyes and ears.. It's difficult and sometimes I can't help it but it's a continuous rising and falling and rising tilll I win by God's grace!

What we expose ourselves to, ideas that start as unharmful seeds grow into dangerous philosophies... I can't make my mind understand how I feed it with the truth of the downside of cheating, lying, unfaithfulness in marriage and divorce and make it get excited and thrilled by the very same thing I stand against.

I had to say bye-bye Scandal.... Though 'harmless' but mans got to guard my heart very jealously..

PS, this not only goes for Scandal.. It's more a metaphor for anything that does not do my mind and soul good.. God help me xxxx

"Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things"

Leave her man alone 2

I knew him first. We knew we had something good almost special (well, I believed we did).. I have even blogged about it HERE

I wanted it to be better defined, he explained why it couldn't be and for some reason, I agreed with him (diary of a fool mugu in 'love'). You see I was so into him, I was happy to have(?) what we had.

Then unceremoniously, she came into his life and just like that, I hear that they were both an item.. I was sad, mildly heartbroken actually, I couldn't understand why? But like the big girl that I am, I didn't cry (well at least not outwardly, but mehn best believe the inner tears were real!) but then the experience taught me, humbled me too - You see, I was that girl who always looked down on girls who 'allowed' things like that to happen to them *rolls eyes*, now I am more empathetic and understanding - I love that as I said HERE

It also taught me to Define a Relationship and not be satisfied with settling for just anything + if a guy is really into you, he would define the relationship..

Anyways, we remained friends - no need to sweat the stuff - and I always felt that he was grateful for that. He still remained one person I knew would bend over backwards for me and I was grateful for that.

(Can I make a confession? I think sometimes during our friendship, I  hoped that one day he would 'come to his senses' and come back).. That was of course until I heard that he had proposed and then they got married. For me that marked the very end - A guy in a relationship is still somehow somehow.. but married?! That's finito! finished! No mincing words about it - I wouldn't even go there!

I respect the institution of marriage and more than that, I respect God!

I maintained my distance and even thought to get to know his wife properly as a protective measure as we would always still be in the same circle (that didn't quite happen). To be very honest, him being married kinda did it for me.. I was not in any way interested in him as I said HERE

Recently, we met again and we had THE talk hence my post HERE.. Again, no hard feelings. We still enjoyed each others' company. He still referred to me as his biggest no 1 fan, he still wanted to do things for me. It was so easy to fall into old habits.. I was beginning to forget that he was married and just remembered the fact that this is my friend, my dawg, we go wayyy back!. To him I would still make an amazing wife, a good mother, great friend et al (of course, this was said friend - friend).

I started to look forward to his calls, talk to him more often.. I mean, this is my bwoyy!

And then I had to stop right in my tracks "ONE, WHAT ARE YOU DOING??!!" Forward ever, backwards never!

What started innocently could potentially violate everything you believe and advocate! I am also a firm believer in 'doing unto others what you want done to you' and I had to be honest with myself that I would not be happy to have my husband that dangerously close to someone with the potential of things going out of control.

I had to GUARD my heart and respect my God and his marriage.

Again, I had more lessons to learn - it doesn't take a lot to do things you never thought you would do.. A little here, a little there.. That's all it takes..
Emotions don't erupt suddenly.. It takes time and can be developed in the little things - a helping hand here, a gratitude there, a weak moment here, a  nice comment there.

Don't get me wrong.. I have many male friends.. Some married as well but I'm learning to recognise when to set boundaries, respect that shiny gold band on their left finger..

In respect to my fellow woman in his house, in respect to him in supporting him to keeping to his end of the deal, and most importantly, in respect to the One I have to give account to when I kneel beside my bed at night or as I communicate with Him throughout the day.

God help us!

Leave her man alone!

I want to get married this year BUT I don't even have a boyfriend.. Is that possible? *thinking*

Ok, so how are you all doing? Great? Great!

Please this message is for the ladies. I have noticed a very distressing thing in Nigeria.. I don't know if it's a new development or I am merely just *waking up* from my slumber hence the coffee smells so strong... *shrugs shoulders*

It has now almost become the norm for married men to have a girl on the side.. Am I right or is it just a figment of my imagination? I would be delighted if I were wrong..

Of course, in situations like this, there are people to be held responsible.. Parties to be blamed, but today I want to appeal to the girl on the side..

It's high time women began to look after one another.. Why would you hurt another woman like yourself in such a way that you know would damage you if put in that position? It baffles me..

I have heard of women who would bend over backwards to be with a married man and even have the effrontery to flaunt it before his wife.

I know many people say that a lot of men cheat (that's debatable) but it takes a willing partner for it to become successful... Have mercy on a woman like yourself and leave HER man alone.. It may not be you, but you have sisters, you have female relatives and someday you may have female children. I tell you the truth, God is clear in His word when He says "whatever a man sows, that will he reap"... There is no doubt about it, you will surely reap.

You cannot expect to add to destroying a woman's home, ruining her family unit and causing such heartbreak for her and the children and then look to have a peaceful life.. No, it wouldn't happen..

Please stop now and let God have mercy..

For some, you may argue that "but I'm not sleeping with him" - Stop calling that married man, stop being his best-friend (that's his wife's duty) and yes even if you feel she's neglecting him, leave them to sort themselves out - stop being his shoulder to cry on, let him cry to God!

Let us learn to look out for one another (guys do it so much better I think).. And when it's your turn, you will enjoy your own home in peace - And God's people say.....

Dare to Dream Again....!

So.. at the beginning of this year I wasn't that excited.. Is that the right word?? Probably, un-optimistic is better suited to how I would describe the way I was feeling..

I usually say that I am a 'forever optimist' by the grace of God.. because of my faith and belief in God I always believe that things could only get better and I was Miss Positive. Positive outlook, positive confessions, positive attitude et al..

However, when I think about how 'positive' I was at the beginning of 2012 and how things did not quite (putting it mildly) turn the way I expected, I was a bit more cautious to dream dreams!

I am a dreamer you see... I day-dream, night-dream, morning-dream, night-dream.. All kinds and manner of dreaming! And I always believe that irrespective of what the circumstance may be, it will all be well amazing in the end!

So, when people started saying "Oh, I just believe that 2013 will be a special year!" "I feel something in the air" "Oh this is my year - One, I'm getting married this year!" "One, I'm starting that business this year, I can seee it!".. I nodded with encouragement and hoped for the best.. I was thinking how can I also say all this wonderful things when those I said before hasn't quite materialised? Let God just have mercy.. I was like "Lord, I'm at your mercy.. Oh Lordy Lord!"...

But then, as I studied the word and listened to people around me, I just kept getting it - It's not time to give up now.. It impresses Me (God) when you have unstinting faith that I can do stuff despite what it looks like now... As long as you keep holding on and don't give up, surely EVERYTHING you have been asking/waiting on will come to pass..

And then God reminded me that sometimes, you need to recognise the fact that you ought to be grateful just because you are still standing! You are still here! You have people who are willing to hold you up! You have a hope! You have a future! My plans for you haven't changed! In the midst of it all, I NEVER left you once... infact I built you up.. I am 'fine-tuning you.. I am moulding you and preparing you for greatness! (THANK YOU JESUS!)

And so, the word I got was 'One, don't stop dreaming.. Infact dream again!'.



Just like a girl or guy who has been broken-hearted, trusting again or starting a new relationship and learning to trust again could be one of the most difficult things.. But strength lies in the fact that you are willing to pick yourself up and try again..

In the same vein, after broken/unfulfilled dreams, after disappointments, the best thing you can do for yourself and to the delight of the One who makes dreams come through is to dream again.. In fact dream BIGGER..

Did you fail in 2012? Did you not excel at what you started? Were you disappointed in 2012? Are you far from where you thought you ought to be now?

Let me share this with you.. It's time to dream again.. And please, dream bigger! And let the one who makes dreams come through, make it come to pass for you!

It will surely come to pass..

With lots of love and eagerly awaiting your stories from 2013 (even before the year runs out!)

1 + The One xxxxx

Happy New Year 2013!

Happy New Year to my very lovely blog fam!



It's so exciting to be celebrating the dawn if 2013 with you and I am certain that this is going to be the best year of our lives so far!

I pray that this year we will experience a miracle in every area that we have been waiting on and praying to God for.. I pray that we will celebrate many many engagements and marriages this year *wink wink*.. We will celebrate new love(s) - SNM take note :-D and I pray that we will have a more intimate work with God as well as a deeper level of commitment and relationship with Him.

I pray that it will be a year of total recovery and restoration for us all and that signs and wonders will be evident in our lives, families and homes.

I pray that for many, we will discover our purpose, make things happen and do great things all to the glory of God!

I pray that our gifts will make room for us and propel us to stand before Kings.

I pray that I will blog more and be a blessing :-D

Sending lots of love and blessings for the new year.

1 + The One xxx

So we Kissed....

I have a confession.. don't take it personal. I have a confession (please) you gotta listen.. (Thank you D'banj! :-)

Ok, on a more real note, I have wanted to write this post for a while but I haven't had the 'energy' to do so but I feel that it is quite important to do so.

Some of you may remember the note 'Taking it Back Old School' where I expressed how I desired my relationship / courtship to be like and hoped it would work out that way. I think I wrote it a few months to my next relationship. I knew that in order to achieve something, it was important to plan ahead for it. I wanted to 'purpose in my heart' like Daniel in the bible did concerning certain decisions, dos and don'ts in my relationship with the One so that things wouldn't 'just happen'. Summary of the post was that before marriage, I wanted to do zilch / nada / nothing sexually with my intended.. so including but not exclusive of kissing, 'quaving' (I don't know if that word still exists!), petting, necking, rubbing etc etc lol

Anyways, thanks to you wonderful people, I had so many encouragements and comments and 'yes you can!' and 'Yes, I will too!'. It was something I desired intently to adhere to and sometimes I would tell my friends, speak it, plan towards it etc.

So, when I met this Christian, tall, talented, gorgeous human being whom I totally totally 'digged' a few months down the line, I was like YES! Thank You Jesus. It was a very flash-fast point from properly meeting / talking / liking / joy / relationship. In fact, point of interaction to relationship was under 1month (God is good! lol). He ticked all the boxes and the most important thing and attractive for me was his walk/relationship with God (that has the potential to make me fall in love with you in seconds haha + the extra summin' summin').

So the day he 'asked me out' (lol) aka for us to become exclusive, inside I was dancing but I was like ok, before I answer, I just have to set out some things and what I had wanted my relationship to be like so I shared with him the 'Taking it back Old School' vision - that was the deal breaker ( I even showed him the post!).. He was mega impressed and totally sold on it agreeing that it was what he wanted as well and could definitely abide by it by God's grace. Haa I was like singing "Jesus, I love you oh!" lol.

The next few weeks was great! We saw each other weekly (we lived in different cities) and it was lovely, just holding hands and hugs when we see + talking, sharing plans and hopes and vision for the near and distant future - it felt GREAT!... But as the days grew by, my attraction shot up by 1000 x 1000 x 1000! I was like mehnnnnn what manner of dilemma is this one? You mean actually 'no kissing'? Oh my! Lord have mercy!

So, One initiated the first kiss.. Yes I did.. I was just like nothing more, just the kiss (I didn't say it loud, just thought it) and it just felt very good, like *sigh* with a tinge of guilt. But as we know, usually after the first taste, other things are bound to follow. We didn't have sex or go deep but there was some kissing and touching (Lord please protect this post from my mother!).

Anyways, why am I sharing this with you? I want to be quite honest with you. From my heart, this was something I wanted to do ie taking it back old school. Not just for the sake of achievement or punishment but more because I honestly wanted to honour God in that way. I have seen people who have done it and I really wanted to commit my relationship to God and honour Him in every way possible. That was my decision and commitment to Him + there are so many things that have started innocently and small and trivial and have ended in a way that we never expected nor planned and I don't want to take that risk at all!

So, I kissed + more... I didn't 'old school' it at all! BUT, I repent. I want to take it God school by God's grace. We broke off the relationship and in a way I thank God for the perspective it's brought back again. I know it's easier said when you're not in a relationship and the attraction is not there to propel you but I believe it's possible. God knows I sincerely want it to work in a way that is pleasing to Him and in a different way for Him.

I have decided that I won't give up my desire and given the opportunity and grace, I would attempt it again - only by GRACE. I have also learnt a lot of things for my future relationship that I hope to share in coming posts.

Also, may I encourage you that if you made a pledge / commitment / decision and for one reason or the other you have failed to do so, God is wonderful in the way He has mercy and forgives, He never gives up on you and I so don't give up on yourself irrespective of how many times you have tried! I believe that He honours effort and gives grace to achieve.

So, ladies and gentlemen, One is taking it God's School! .... So help me God :-)

Goodbye 2010, Hello 2011!

Goodbye 2010, Hello 2011!

As it is customary, the first month of the year, January is well-known for resolutions. Usually, the dawn of a new year brings with it fresh promises, renewed dedication, re-ignited passion and fresh hope! In December, one reviews the past year, counts their losses and blessings and hopes that the following year would be better than the previous one.

In the same vein, we say goodbye to 2010 and hello to 2011! It’s time to take stock of how well we did in the area of relationships and which area we need to make resolutions about. The success or failure of the relationship area of our lives does not lie in whether one was able to meet the one or whether one’s relationship status changed from single to engaged , or from engaged to married, rather it is important to measure how much progress one has made.

Progress to some may mean that as a single person, you have been able to improve yourself while waiting patiently for the right person. It’s time to ask yourself questions: “What have I done with myself in the past 12months?” Have you ‘counted sheep’ while waiting for the right relationship to come your way? Have you spent the time obsessing about whether or not the new friend you met is the ONE? Maybe you have spent the last year being bitter and angry at your single status and wondering everyday when your turn to be in a relationship with a significant other would come. Otherwise, you may have been discovering the amazing person God has made you to be! Have you spent time getting to know and fall in love with YOU? Have you come to understand the unique purpose that only you were created to fulfil on this earth? Have you taken time to learn new skills, travel to new destinations, make new friends and enjoy the companionship of family and friends? Have you spent the last one year being the best that you can be? If you haven’t, then it’s time to make a resolution.

Progress in the relationship section could also mean for some that you have been able to get rid of the unfulfilling relationship to make room for God’s best for you. Have you been able to let go of the one that seems to be draining you rather than building you up? Have you been able to say no to the one that common opinion says to just endure but your heart knows will not lead to what you have always dreamed of? Has the past year meant that you have had to make some tough decisions and walk away from some associations? If you are still hanging unto a dead-end relationship, you need to make a resolution.

In addition, progress could mean for some that you have met the ONE. The one that meets your individual preference in a life partner, the one that makes you smile from within, the one that builds you and encourages you to be the best that you can. Have you confirmed with the One who knows all hearts and intents, the One who created the ONE? Have you committed it in prayers to God and asked Him for directions and guidance, as His word says.. “In all your ways, acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path”. If you haven’t, it’s not too late to make a resolution! And if you have, you can still make a resolution, ask yourself “At the end of this year, where would I like to see us?”

It’s time to make a resolution!

Ladies!

..So I was thinking to myself, "when I get back to blogville, what would I like the theme of my blog to be" cause I don't want to write pointlessly, that would surely be a waste of my time. I have always wanted to be an inspiration, especially to young ladies (I don't know why) but I've always had a heart for young ladies like myself, and sort of considered it my "ministry".

My desire is to see more young ladies step out for God, ladies who would value themselves and have a solid cast-iron self-esteem that no one would be able to rubbish. One area that I know is very peculiar to many young ladies is the big "R" word; RELATIONSHIPS. Hence the reason why this blog dwells heavily (and more) on it. My desire is to see young ladies in more fulfilling relationships, to be treated with love and respect and handled delicately by whomever they have entrusted their hearts to.

My passion is ladies! I'm not a feminist, not at all. Neither am I a male-basher. But I recognise the special qualities that God has blessed women with. You better believe it, God loves women (specially)!

I hope to talk about a wide range of issues that are important to young ladies, using personal experiences sometimes to buttress a topic and generally facilitate a forum that women would feel free to express themselves, learn from one another and be inspired.

May God help me! xx

For those in a relationship/married (or not), I dedicate this song to you!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

WELCOME TO THE YEAR 2009!!

Wow! Aren't you glad you made it!! It's always a beautiful feeling at 00:00 of the first day in a new year. There's always this joyous even euphoric, expectant feeling.

It's great to see another year gone past!!

I pray that this year would be better than anyone before. May we all be great achievers in this new year, may our expectations not be cut short. May we have the grace to dream BIG!! And may our dreams become reality....

I wish you all the best from the very bottom of my heart. There's nothing that you cannot achieve nor become with God, for with Him all things are possible. If you can think it, you can see it, if you can see it, you can say it. If you can say it and believe it you can most definately achieve it by the grace of God almighty!

Don't let anything limit you. Don't put barriers to your dreams.....dare to dream impossible, that's why God gave you a mind and a heart! For with Him, nothing shall be impossible!!.

It's a new start, a new beggining... the latter shall always surpass the former!!

God bless xxxxxxx