Get a love upgrade!

Don’t settle for one who loves you, seek one who loves God!

A number of us settle for less in relationships. We settle for someone who loves us without aiming higher for one who loves God even more.

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You see, it’s beautiful for someone to love you and everything about you – the way you talk with your hands, the way the side of your eyes crinkle when you laugh, the way you speak softly and kindly to every single person that comes your way, the way you act patiently even in the midst of the worst storms, the way you take responsibility for your actions and can be depended upon.. Just the loveliness of you!

BUT I dare say that, if that’s the foundation of their love for you (as wonderful as it is), it’s not enough, and you may just be settling when you could get a love upgrade!

Better is the one who loves God and whose love for God fuels their love for you.

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You see, when you love God, there are certain things that you will do and not do. When you respect God, you will choose to obey Him whether it’s convenient or not convenient. It goes beyond the blessings you get for being obedient, it’s more about preserving the precious relationship you share with the Lover of your soul. Your love for human beings becomes sacrificial because you’re not doing it for them, you are doing it for HIM.

...So, when I slip, and I am not as wonderful as the first day you met me, you are still willing to rub my back and make me tea because you know that the Gentleman of Galilee would want that.

...So that when I forget to do that thing you told me a million times to do, as hard as it is, you forgive me because you can’t bear the thought of not being able to have fellowship with your God because of unforgiveness.

...So that when that hot luscious specimen of a human being waltz past you in a haze of heady perfume, you begin to find a way of escape because you know that you are not just accountable to me, you are accountable to your God and because you love Him so, you don’t want to hurt the relationship you have built with him and that you enjoy so.

Don't get me wrong, they will make mistakes.. Which human being doesn’t? They will fall – oh yes, they will! But, you can be secure in the knowledge that their love for God will keep bringing them back to the place of true repentance.

It’s great to have a love who is in it for you but it is even better to know that the basis of their love is in God whose love never fails.

Don’t settle, get the best! xx

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Waiting and Loving It!!! Feat Maria and Tokunbo Dunsin

Hiya lovelies!

It's another Tuesday and you know what that means... Waiting and Loving It!!! If it's your first time, a huge WELCOME to you! Please feel free to read the introduction HERE and this post HERE ... Also, you can check out previous features on the blog!

Well today, I am stepping back to allow a very beautiful and lovely woman take us through her and her husband's experience.. I absolutely enjoyed reading and was blessed in so many ways.. Ladies and Gentlemen, enjoy.... xx

Waiting and Loving It - My Story

My name is Maria Dunsin formerly known as Maria Ugbodaga. I am from a large family of nine and the 7th in my family. We were brought up by my lovely and devoted parents.  I worked for my church in Nigeria for a few years and travelled to the United Kingdom for 'greener pastures'. Life in the UK initially wasn't what I thought it would be initially as I encountered some difficulties. Anyways, I guess I have been destined to work for God as I was offered the job of a Secretary in my church in the UK. I worked for a caring man of God, a man with a big heart.

Working in the church office was tough but I overcame the challenges. One particular challenge I had was that, everyone was getting married, and I would be the one to welcome them, prepare the documents for their counselling sessions and be one of the first few to know that they were about to walk down the aisle. It got to a point that I became almost depressed as nothing was happening in my life. My pastor who was like a father to me, was there to consistently encourage me not to settle for less and always affirmed me, saying that I was beautiful, and that if anyone approached me I should ask them "Can you maintain me" (Lol). 

This boosted my confidence and I knew that there was one Mr Right out there for me as I wasn't getting younger. This continued until one 'Brother' Tokunbo came along. He was very gentle, quiet, helpful, a confidant and he became my best friend. After so many years of 'shakara' (playing hard to get) and a careful consideration, I said yes and we got married in 2009. 

"Though the vision is for an appointed time, wait for it for it shall surely come to pass", 

Paraphrasing Habbakuk 2:3. As I got married at the age of 34.

The Tale of How we Met...

I met my husband as I said earlier on in our church, he actually came to the office and I was told that he was a member who went away as he got a job outside Manchester, where I reside in the UK. After his contract ended (he was working out of town), he came back and came by to say hello to our Pastor and his lovely wife. I remember that day because, Pastor's wife cheekily introduced us and I was like "And so?", because to me he didn't look like a 'brother', 'spiri- koko' (my usual expectation of how a spirit- filled brother should look). He had a few rings on and he didn't look like Denzel Washington. 

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Don't judge me, lol.... That was my own expectation and prayer point to my heavenly Father of how I wanted my husband to look like. 

Please, don't judge people by the way they look or dress o, as I almost missed my blessing! Be open minded and get to know people first, as the ring he had on was him trying to 'belong' to the society he was living in, (Do you know that as I am typing this, I have extra rings on and that doesn't mean that am less spiritual!).. By the way, he doesn't wear any ring now apart from his wedding band.

The Attraction crept in....

What initially attracted me to him was his quiet nature, his level of commitment and dedication to the things of God. As I got to know him more (he often came to the office to help Pastor as he was made one of his PAs), I realised that he was a genuinely nice and caring person, who would go the extra mile to help people. Also, it wasn't just me who saw this, other people's opinion of him as 'Mr Nice' confirmed that it wasn't just me that thought he was nice, he was indeed a good man. 

He hasn't changed, he's a good father and a wonderful husband. The bible says "Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the LORD, she shall be praised" Prov 31:30. This is true and it applies to men too!

When he made his intentions known, and after some 'grilling' and investigation about him done by my wonderful and blessed Sister, (sis you know yourself) and myself, I was still not clearly sure. One night after I had a heart to heart discussion with my sister, I went to bed with concern because to me - this is the man I would be spending the rest of my life with and I didn't want to go in and come out of the marriage, as I see marriage as a life commitment. I prayed to God and I received a word from Him in Jeremiah 1:7, this to me didn't make sense as it didn't talk about marriage or clearly say, "Maria, you can marry Tokunbo". But later on, it became clear that God was saying to me that if people doubt or oppose your decision in saying yes to him, tell them that I, the Lord was sending you to go ahead. 

This word kept me going and thank God, he also had a revelation which he shared with me that the journey would be rough but once we focus on Jesus, it would be smooth later. 

A Time to Wait...

The issue of sex was not even a topic of discussion in my family as we were brought up in a Christian home and our beloved father was a strict disciplinarian. And as I gave my life to Christ, I also got to know that it was a grievous sin that Christ frowns upon as Hebrews 13:4 says "Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge". The fear of my father, the discipline of my older Sister and the commandment of God on sex was the beginning of wisdom for me! I could always picture my father in my head, wearing his glasses, slightly pushed down his nose, holding a big whip (known as koboko in Nigeria) and saying to me 'Don't you dare!'.

Now that I have crossed that line...

My advise to the singles out there, is pray, pray and pray to God until He's tired of hearing your voice about your future partner. Also, that  He should help you to identify that person when he/she comes. God will never fail you, He's our father and He loves us so, so much that He would not let you fall into the wrong hands. In addition, seek godly counsel and listen to them prayerfully.

The View Looks Mighty Good from Here! :-)

One of the best parts about being married is being called 'Mrs. Dunsin' *wide grin*.. There's respect that comes with being married and of course the fact that I have someone to share 'stuff' with! :-)

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I hope you enjoyed reading as much as I did!Their story is reflective of God's faithfulness.. No matter how long it takes, He will certainly come through for you.. Also, to encourage you that no matter how long it is, it is still very possible to wait.. Not easy but God honours.. It is true afterall, everybody is doing IT - Waiting and Loving It!

If you have any personal questions or want to share something privately, or want to be featured please contact me oneplustheone@gmail.com or follow me @1plustheone

xx

Flaunt It!.. Hearty Meals just got all shades of interesting!

Hi everyone! Hope you had a brilliant and restful weekend? (Isn't it interesting that weekends are there to rest but we actually hardly ever do that!).. It's just an extension of work, many times - 'social' work.

Mine was great! It was a great time at the Redemption Camp for the Special Holy Ghost Service - If you haven't had the opportunity to attend one of these... You're missing a right treat! It was superliciously-listic! And it was topped up with a fantastic time in church on Sunday! Brilliant weekend!

Anywyys, I am introducing 2 brand spanking new 'days' to the blog! As many of you know, Tuesday is Waiting and Loving It!!! Day.. Now, on Monday we have *Flaunt It* Day and on Wednesday, there's a very interesting series starting up! I will talk about that a bit more on Wednesday so.. stay tuned! :-D

Now, *Flaunt It* Day would be a platform/avenue for new/emerging ideas, innovations, releases, achievements et al! I believe very much that with God, impossible is nothing! And with Flaunt It, we would be able to celebrate people who have begun to do great things, start new businesses, launch new initiatives! And oossible give ourselves a bargain in the process too! (don't you just love freebies like me?! :-D)

So without much further ado.. I present to you the first new and brilliant business idea -

**HEARTY MEALS**

Healthy eating just got interesting..

                 
Hearty Meals is the brain child of two wonderful young women in Nigeria and is all about making healthy eating more achievable for you and I (Yayyy!)

It's really simple... Are you desirous of a healthy liifestyle yet unable to have the time to commit to achieving it? Did you start off the year with the fantastic plan of losing weight/living a healthier lifestyle yet time and chance said no?

The Hearty Meals team are dedicated to ensuring you are afforded the chance of meeting your daily calorie requirements, whilst exciting your taste buds (yippee!), and not having to stress about getting this done each and every day (*bliss!!*). They create and provide delicious, nutritious and well-balanced meals for you using fresh and seasonal ingredients free from refined carbohydrates and measured to the right quantities.

Nutritionists develop a unique menu for you based on the principles of balanced and healthy eating standards, Their very experienced chefs shop, cook, while the delivery team deliver healthy meals to your doorstep, in good time, making sure you don’t have to lift a finger to do so. (*sigh* I'm in food heaven!)

All you have to do is sign up and you have healthy AND delicious meals delivered to you at a veryy reasonable price!! (Amazing huh?!)

 

Contact numbers are 08098884079, 08172044525 and 08172044526

heartymealsng@gmail.com  

Registration is free when you quote 'oneplustheone' (valid while stock lasts!! hehe)

Facebook - HeartyMeals Nigeria

Tweet Tweet - @heartymealsng

Instagram: @heartymealsng
Google +: heartymealsng
BBM Channel: C0019F882

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Would you like to feature your idea/business/innovation et al on Flaunt It Monday? Please send me an email oneplustheone@gmail.com or on twitter @1plustheone

Have a fabulous week people and don't forget to Flaunt It - God's style! *cool shades*! xxxx

Don't be a fool, choose your love wisely

Whenever I hear of yet another case of domestic violence, it makes me so sad! Like why? why? why on earth?!!

Why would you inflict such hurt - physical and emotional on someone that you profess to love or that you have made a commitment to?

I believe very much that 'prevention is better than cure'.. Usually people say that there are signs in relationships that you can identify to tell what someone is capable of or not (not in all cases) but in enough cases to avoid being in a depleting, draining and destructive marriage.

"But I love him/her!" 

- "Oh, zip it!!"

Why do you stay when you know that the person is somehow inclined to do horrible things to you? Why do you go ahead when you know that this person has the potential to hurt you! Forget the 'good days', because if you do go ahead, they will pale in significance to the horror of the bad days! This not only applies to domestic violence but other bad habits too - cheating, emotional abuse, stinginess, irresponsibility, lies...

Why would you mar your destiny and life because of the inability, wisdom and confidence to make an informed decision.

My people perish for lack of knowledge..

If you don't know, get knowledge.. As a single individual, do your research... Don't sit down and count sheep, and when it's time to make a decision, you are so devoid of knowledge and information that you don't even know counterfeit when the signs are written all over their foreheads! You deserve so much more!

And when you have information, be wise.. Don't ignore the signs. Be real with yourself, your future and your destiny.. The pain you will experience now in breaking it off is worth more than the future horrors of remaining.

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Children have been left orphaned, broken, destroyed due to a careless choice. Don't add to the statistics..

Great destinies lie unfulfilled, in the grave, never seeing the light of day because of a really bad choice, don't be a statistic.

Mothers, fathers have had to go through the harrowing experience of burying their own children because of a very bad choice.. don't add to the numbers.

Men and women who are but a shadow of themselves, walk pass you day by day - 'alright' on the outside but oh so empty on the inside/ full on the inside but unable to express the greatness that lies fallow on the inside, all because of a terrible choice they made.. please don't do that to yourself..

Save your future, save your generations to come.. Get knowledge, get information, ask questions, confide in mentors, prepare yourself. There are sooo many resources available to us all today on relationships, marriages et al. There are real life examples to learn from too.. Don't ignore the signs.. If you have to, leave NOW!

"Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom. And in all your getting, get understanding". - Proverbs 4:7

Waiting and Loving It!!! - Feat InTheMidstofHer and Hubster!

It's another Tuesday and I am just as excited as you are about today's feature on the Waiting and Loving It series!! First time here? You may have a clearer picture of the background to this series by reading the first feature HERE and also this post HERE

Today's feature is quite unique in that it is from a couple who prefer to be anonymous.. A lot of you are probably very familiar with this lovely blogger and I am really glad that she was very willing to be featured (Her first response after I contacted her about the idea of the series was - Sure! You know this is my bread and butter lol - you gotta love her!).. Without further ado, ladies and gentlemen, sit back, relax, enjoy and be blessed!

1. Hiya Inthe and Hubster! I must say that I am delighted/thrilled/excited to be able to feature you on this series! Thank you so much for agreeing to do this.. Please give us a little introduction to who you are:



Ayo! what a pleasure it is to be part of this movement. The Hubster and I are grateful!! Since I am the talker and he the thinker; I’ll be doing the talking for the both of us. For those reading, My name is Inthemidstofher, please call me “Inthe…” I am an anonymous blogger married to my man, my baby daddy, my who I fondly call "the Hubster”. We have been married a little over 4 years and we have a 3 yr old son I call “Baby boy”. I am a medical doctor and the hubster is a Sceintist

2. Super! Ladies and gentlemen, we have geniuses in the house! :-) ... Please tell us how you both met

     

Ha! Funny story. My best guy friend in medical school was the Hubster’s best friend in Uni; one day he told me; “Inthe, I have this best friend who I think you will be perfect for. Well, after a bus load of shakara on my side and bucket full of patience on his, we became a couple.

3. Lol @shakara... So, what would you say initially attracted you to each other?

I’ll be honest. My intentions for the hubster was to “use” him. Yes, you read that right. Use him, but in a different kind of way. When I first met him, I was still a baby Christian without many godly examples in my life. The hubster had been saved since he was a child so by the time we met; he had a strong solid head on his shoulders. He knew who he was and what he was called for; I admired that. My plan was to swoop in, suck some wisdom at his feet and hit the door. Uhm, guess again.

              

The more I knew him, the more I admired him and the more I admired, the more I was attracted to him. It didn’t help that he was also a tall glass of hotness! On his part, he liked my sense of humor and my thirst for God. I wasn’t the typical “SU” girl! I was able to laugh and love God at the same time. He also loved the fact that I love to cook; that trait complemented his dedication to eating…lol.

4. I love that! You had your plans, God had his.. Guess who won? lol.. Now, how did you know that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with him?

After the hubster and I got to know each other, he made his intentions known. I mean he literally blurted out. “Hey Inthe, I am not hanging around you without cause or reason, I’m going to marry you someday” Ugh, stuff got real that day. Being with him as a friend was comfortable and safe because I knew he had no cruel intentions but the day he told me he wanted to be in a relationship with me with the intentions of marriage; I had to decide what I really wanted from him. This wasn’t a “ You’re cute, let's date and see where this goes” but a “ I’m going to marry you someday, if you’d let me.” Like I said, things got real…real fast! The ball was in my court. I told him to give me a week to think about it and I basically laid on my couch praying, searching the bible and seeking God’s face for an answer. I knew saying yes to the hubster was saying, “Yes” to forever. I did not believe in divorce and I was going to lay in whatever bed I was about to make.

                   

In choosing the hubster, my standard was the 1st 3 Tim man. This was the scripture God outlined for the qualities he wanted in a church leader. I figured if these traits were good enough to govern God’s house, then it must be good enough to rule my heart. I placed the hubster beside this “ruler” and he PASSED with flying colors. To be honest, I was scared out of my mind but I trusted in God’s word. (Ayo, your readers can read more about making my decision in detail here http://www.inthemidstofher.com/2011/06/how-we-became-couple.html)

The process was easier for the hubster. He asked God if I was the one, God said “Yes” and the rest was history!

5. Wow.. that's amazing. I have read that blog post and I absolutely love it. Definitely one for every single girl to bookmark! Very brilliant. 

Next question, what made you make the decision to wait?

It was never a decision per se. Before I got saved, I remained a virgin because I didn’t think anyone was good enough for me. I held my body in high esteem but more out of pride than loving God. To be honest, I felt no one was good enough to get “this”. When I got saved, my perspective changed. I gave up dating and threw myself into trying to know God and growing spiritually. (Remember, that’s actually why I became friends with the hubster…lol) I was trying to surround myself with people who lived and reflected the word.

                 

It was different for the hubster! He had been saved from childhood so he had already made his decision to wait waaaay before he even met me. It was a “take it or leave it” part of him; it wasn’t up to question or compromise.

6. That's great.. So I know it may not have been that easy or straightforward, please share with us what practical measures you took to ensure that you stuck by your decision?

There was TEAMWORK! We agreed we were going to wait and then we strived towards it. Unless you both agree on this, trouble lies ahead.

We were both students and in a long distance relationship till the day we married so that helped because we only got to see about every 4-6 weeks and holidays. Sometimes, I would need a quick fix and make an impromptu flight down but we were conscious of each other’s purse so we tried to remain structured. He had roommates; I had roommates so we were never alone. EVERYONE held us accountable!!

                     

We were also careful with physicality. After I got saved, I had vowed that my next kiss would be at the altar (You should have seen the hubster’s face when I told him about this vow…hahaha. I thought he was going to cry!!! He got his first chance to taste my luscious lips as my husband) so there wasn’t any "making out” and all those heavy kissing sessions that might lead us astray were non existent. The “No Kissing" rule is not for everyone but it was definitely for us.

Team Work…Team Work….TEAMWORK!

7. LOL @Hubsters face.. I can imagine. Thank God it was worth the wait :-).

Now that you have crossed the line, what one advice would you give to your single self in preparation for marriage.

                   

I would say, “ Inthe…, there is a time and season for everything! Guard your heart and spend your single years intentionally.


8. Fantastic.. Lastly, please describe in 3 words / sentences the best part of being married!

 

Love…family…fulfilling destiny!.

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Once again, thank you sooo much InThe and Hubster for such an exciting feature and for blessing us with your story. InThe's blog is one that I have learnt soo much from! She has helped to build me up richly through her posts and I will definitely recommend that you visit www.inthemidstofher.com, grab a comfortable position and try to go through ALL her posts! :-) and follow her on twitter @inthemidstofher

Something I took away from this and definitely agree with is the fact that she mentioned TEAMWORK as a key to making it work.. You both have to be on the same page, talk about it, share your dreams and visions so that you are both singing from the same sheet. Purposely determine boundaries and practical ways to help each other. It's possible by God's grace.

"Can two walk together unless they are agreed?" Amos 3:3

Don't forget, you can email me directly at oneplustheone@gmail.com with any question, and also if you would like to be featured on this series. Also follow on twitter @1plustheone .. Thanks! xxx

A grateful dog has more worth than..

Hello everyone! Hope you all had a fabulous weekend? I did! My weekend is usually super after a fantastic time in church! Have I told you lately that I absolutely love my church?! Lol.. Well if you need any reminding, you can find out a few of my favourite things about church HERE. We had another wonderful thanksgiving service yesterday and it is soo good to spend time praising a God who deserves it so and thanking Him for blessings past, present and future!

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Talking about thanksgiving and saying thank you, its importance couldn’t be over-stressed. We have heard it before, a grateful heart receives more. Besides that, thankfulness is a sign of a good character and endears people to one’s self. In addition to saying thank you, it is important to have an attitude that seeks to always find something to be grateful for!

It is easy sometimes, to think “Oh but you haven’t done anything ‘thank-worthy’”, however, I have come to realise that sometimes we miss the opportunity to show love and gratitude due to our very limited outlook on things and this has the potential to undo many good relationships (platonic and romantic).

What’s your first reaction when someone does something good for/to you, no matter how little? Are you thinking and saying “You could have done better” “Is that all?” “Others are buying Swarovski jewellery, you are buying flowers!” (haha)

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(Yup, don't be that person who forgets good gestures easily in the face of one disappointment)

The truth is sometimes we don’t know how much effort/sacrifice has gone into giving us that ‘small’ thing but if we keep focusing on what ‘could have been better’, we totally miss it! And sure enough we may never be the recipient of any further good gesture.

I remember when I was younger, we had someone live with us for a while and after every meal, he would go to my mum and say thank you. My siblings and I thought it was quite funny and made fun of him thinking, “Calm down bruv, it’s just food, it’s normal, and she’s our mother after all, if she doesn’t give us food, who will? Lol, In a way, it’s her duty right? Nothing special there.. Well, WRONG! I guess we forgot that the fact that we have food on our table 3 times a day, every day was a real blessing indeed and quite frankly the fact that she chose to take her responsibility and commitment to us seriously was indeed more than thank-worthy no matter how frequently it happened!

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Have you said thank you for that meal? Have you said thank you to that loyal friend who has remained constant in and out of season? Have you said thank you for the last birthday treat? (even though it fell below your expectations). Have you said thank you for your Valentine’s Day card and cupcakes even though you were expecting your favourite perfume? (After ALL the not too subtle hints! lol). Have you said thank you because he never fails to call on you just to check that you’re alright? Have you said thank you because she is consistently nice to your friends (even the obnoxious ones!), Have you said thank you for the phone cards he buys for those long distance calls, have you said thank you for her keeping awake to ensure that she receives your long-distance calls?

This week make it a plan to show gratitude for even the ‘smallest’ of things and refrain (as hard as it may be), to keep from complaining “you mean that’s all?!”– You may be surprised at how far it will go!

Thank you to all those who visit, who comment and who come back again and again.. I am grateful xx

Do you LOVE?

There's this question that crops up time and time again - What is love? Like, when you say 'I love you' what are you trying to say or express?

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I'm not just talking about love in the romantic context but just love - as human beings, particularly love as God commands... Remember, all the commandments summarised could be - Love God (with all that you are and all that you have), love yourself (completely and just in the way God does) and of course love your neighbour as you love yourself!

I think in describing love, 1Corinthians 13, breaks it right down (it's a favourite at many weddings) and I'll use that as my cue for describing the characteristics of love:

1. Patient – When you love, you have the ability to suffer long; you take your time to help people without complaining or sighing at every opportunity. When you love, you are willing to wait and be of good cheer while doing so. Are you patient?

2. Kind – Dictionary defines being kind as being considerate, helpful or being humane.It means you go out of your way to help people, whether you know them or not. It could be that you ensure that people around you feel comfortable being in your presence. It means that you think of how you can make someone’s life better without being asked to. Are you kind? 

3. Does not Envy – When you love, you resist the urge to feel jealous about your neighbour. They could seem to have a nicer home, drive a better car, have a more successful business but your love for them means that you pray for them to be blessed even more! It is quite rare to see a mother competing with her child, in fact most parents pray that their children achieve much more than they did. It is time to stop competing with ourselves and instead learn to start complimenting ourselves in love. Are you envious? 

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4. Humble – Do you flaunt your achievements in the face of others so that they know what you have and they don’t? Are you humble? 

5. Not rude – Acting rudely is described in the dictionary as being discourteous or impolite especially in a deliberate way. Do you watch your manners and the way you speak to people - young or old, boss or subordinate? If you aren’t, God is. He loves and regards every single one of us equally and sees us all as precious in His sight. He expects us to do the same to every one of His children that He thought important enough to lay His life down for. Are you rude? 

6. Not selfish – To show love, you need to be able to think about others when thinking about yourself. To love means to sometimes go out of your way to do things that are not convenient in order to help some other person. Do you think about yourself and how each decision affects you all the time? Are you selfless? 

7. Peaceful – Everyone loves a peace maker, everyone wants to be in the company of an individual who promotes peace, no one wants to be associated with trouble makers. What’s your story? Love is not easily provoked. Love does not act or speak in anger to her neighbour. Love forgives easily irrespective of what has been done. Are you peaceful? 

8. Pure in heart –Love thinks no evil and believes the best in everyone. It does not sow discord among people nor entertain gossip of any kind. Are you pure in heart? 

9. Rejoices! - Celebrates truth, progress and not failures or weaknesses. Do you see the good in others AND let them know about it? Pay someone a compliment today! 

10. Bears all things –Love is not overly sensitive nor takes offence easily. Love is open to correction and chastisement without feeling the need to get defensive. Love waits to listens to what the next person has to say. How much are you able to take?

11. Believes all things – Love is trusting (No matter what precedence may be) and is willing to fully let go of the past. Are you still holding on to an offence?

12. Hopes all things – Love has faith always.

13. Endures all things –Love never gives up

14. Never fails – Love is constant, consistent and unwavering in its support of its recipient.

Wow! What a tall order! To love is not the easiest of things! But to do we must, and the grace to do is made available by the One who proclaims that He is Love!

He who does not love, does not know God, for God is love - 1John 4:8

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xxxx

Show some loveee -

Twitter: @1plustheone

Email: oneplustheone@gmail.com

Out in the open!

Hiya!

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First of all, a MASSIVE thanks to everyone for the love shown here, on twitter, Facebook, email and phone calls!!! Honestly though, I am blessed with the most amazing family, friends and blog family!! You guys absolutely and totally rock! The encouragement I have received has been invaluable and I can only say thank you from the bottom of my heart!

My bestest friend in the whole world who happens to also be my sister is just a wonderful human being, as in honestly! She’s known about the blog for a while now and she’s been one half of my biggest cheerleaders (the other being my fabulous mum who introduced me to the world of blogging through her regular visits to Linda Ikeji’s blog many years ago! Thanks mum! :-).

I didn’t know until recently that my sister had read every single one of my posts and actually comments anonymously or with a pseudonym – she never said a word about it and I remember times without number how I accused her of not visiting nor giving me her opinion etc etc – and the babe would just be quiet, not saying anything! + She used to send the link to her friends asking them to check out “this very good blog” lol – You just got to love her!

Then, I remember having to send the link to my wonderful mum the day before to ‘confess’ (as I had never told her about it), and ask her opinion before going public and she, responding in the most enthusiastic of ways with pointers and suggestions that I just threw my head back laughing when I read it – knowing that God has definitely blessed me with such wonderful treasures in human skin…

Talking about treasures, the response and positive comments from bloggers whom I have never met physically but have been such joyous comrades in blogsville have been beyond what I could have expected! Thank you so much guys, you are all just too much and I have learnt sooo much from you! Lord knows how many times I have used your resources to inform many-a-decisions and also gladly shared with my friends! (There’s love in sharing ey?)

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And my friends in 3D, first of all, a huge thanks to those who did not dump me when they knew I had a blog but was unwilling to share the details! Lol – You guys are pure gold! And to the ones who knew but pretended like they didn’t (haha), God bless you! (Especially my funky fly Pastor in the diaspora – James Bond ain’t got nothing on you! Lol

Ok, so this is a formal welcome to first-timers and a re-welcome to old-timers! I sincerely and deeply appreciate you!

First time here?

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Not to worry, here are hopefully easy navigation tools:

1. You can view older posts on the right hand corner under the heading – ‘There’s More to Love’ - You can read by dates/months/years if you prefer

2. If you want a more specific topic, please find under ‘Easy Navigation’ (further down on your right) and click on any topic you fancy

3. You can also look to the right to view the most popular posts based on number of views!

4. If you would like to receive new post notifications by email, please follow by entering your email in the box on the right (this means you get posts fresh off the press!)

5. If you are a blogger or on Google+, you can follow using the link on the right

6. Very importantly, under ‘My Blog Hall of Fame’ please check out as many other blogs there as possible (all if you can) – trust me, there’s blog-gold right there! You will discover so many blog-treasures there, you would possibly not one to stop reading! Absolutely fantastic blogs!

Ok, I guess that’s all folks! Please don’t forget, you can email me directly at oneplustheone@gmail.com and please follow me on twitter @1plustheone. I always welcome your feedback and comments – they mean a lot to me!

Thanks people, you absolutely rock absolutely! xx

Waiting and Loving It!! - Feat Emma and Obinna Anyadike

Hello everyone!

First of all, thank you veryyy much everyone who left a comment on the last post and on twitter too! I felt the loveee and I am grateful *kisses kisses*..

Today, we continue the waiting and loving it series.. If it's your first time visiting - WELCOME!! (with bells on!) You may want to read Series One, Two and Three too (just click on one of them)! Series One will give you a better background to this series!

In the meantime, please sit back, relax and enjoy reading the experience of our featured couple for today!

1. Hiya both! Delighted to have you on here and thanks for agreeing to do this! Please could you tell us a little about yourselves?

                               

Obi: Hello, my name is Obinna; I am Nigerian, from Nanka, Anambra State. We have been married for 4 and a half years and it has been a learning experience. I work in Tata Steel as a SAP Support Analyst. I studied Physics as my first degree and Masters in Business and Law. We also started a Healthcare business with Forever Living which we believe will expand further and give us an opportunity to achieve our dreams

Emma: Hi my name is Emma; I am Welsh from Penygroes (Head of the Cross). We have been married for 4 and half years though it feels like 55 years!!! I am an accountant but I run a dental practice as the manager. We have a little boy called Noah Dafydd Ifeanyichukwu. I have been a Christian all my life. I used to play the piano in my worship band but haven’t done so in a while.

2. That's lovely. So Mr and Mrs Anyadike, how did you meet?

                                            

Obi: After my Masters, I always hung out with friends from our church Swansea Elim City Church, especially as I was part of the football team. We met in 2008 as she was in the worship group, and we started chatting unofficially then it went official. Missed her when she went on holiday.

Emma: Through a friend in church and we started chatting on Yahoo mail. Then we continued chatting via Facebook while on holiday. Very excited looking forward to his messages.

3. Obinna, what initially attracted you to Emma, and Emma to Obinna?

Obi: Her blond hair, companionship and her sense of humour. She is funnier than me. She just has pure Welsh humour where it is common to make fun of yourself. I love to have a good laugh

Emma: Nothing really!! (Laughs her head off) No seriously, his nose, his muscles (saw him in a black vest playing tennis!!) and his friendliness which was the biggest thing as we could talk for hours.

4. How did you know that you wanted to spend the rest of your life with Obinna/Emma?

                               

Obi: It was a battle but God first changed my mind set and showed the great love I had for her through a dream. I never knew how much I did, until I had that dream. The most interesting thing though was the grace we experienced. Things that people thought would be difficult we discovered it wasn’t an issue for us. We believed we could build our future on what we saw no matter the obstacles to the contrary.

Emma: Despite the huge culture differences, we seemed to click immediately. Getting those butterflies every time I saw him just didn’t go away. We could talk for hours on anything and everything and never did we get bored. And most importantly despite huge challenges and opposition I knew that this is who God has brought into my life, who am I to argue?

5. Now getting to the main question, what made you make the decision to wait?

                                

Obi: I already had sex before marriage and though I enjoyed it, it felt empty and unsatisfactory. No fulfilment. As I walked deeper with God, I knew the essence and importance of intimacy and I knew it had to wait, not only for honour sake to myself and God, but for true love for God and my spouse. I re-dedicated myself and body

Emma: Having spoken to my pastor a few years ago, he was explaining that sex is not a dirty thing as we often think it is and that it’s wrong, but he made me understand that it is to protect myself and keeping me from hurt and that saving myself for my husband was a special thing.

6. That's great. Please share with us some practical measures you took to ensure that you stuck by your decision.

Obi: When I came to Swansea from Nigeria (for my Masters programme), I made sure I had no female company alone, though when I started going out with Emma, I didn’t abide by that rule, but I was in the middle of my dissertation. We made sure we never moved in to the same house till we got married. We also ensured we had fellowship and prayer.

Emma: Even though we bought a house together 4 months before getting married we didn’t live in it. Obi moved in but I continued to live at home.

                                           

7. That's very useful, thank you. Now, what one advice would you give to your single self in preparation for marriage now that you’ve crossed that line?

Obi: It is easy to create hype and fall into temptation before marriage, but focus on what’s important, love and honour. So to grow in honour and favour with God and men (meaning of Israel) across boundaries, keep to this code and God will bless you as He did the early Christians because Jesus said ‘Whatever you agree to bind or release in heaven…’ complete it yourself.

Emma: With regards to having a sexual relationship before marriage, I would advise to refrain. That part of the relationship is what bonds the marriage and adds the special touch.

8. Finally, please describe in 3 words / sentences the best part of being married!

                                 

Obi: Love, soul mates and oneness

Emma: soul mates, love, belonging


             

Thank you so much for being honest Emma and Obi! May God continue to strenghthen the friendship and love that exist in your home and marriage!

I hope you loved reading and hopefully learning from Emma and Obi's story.. Do you know what is beautiful too? You can do it too!

Like Obinna, you may have been there, done that and even probably bought the T-shirt! However, once you make a commitment to God to do what is right by Him, He is able to give you the grace to do it. That's great right?

And like Emma, even if God has to bring your spouse on a long journey - cross-continent - to meet you, He will so do it! God is the Perfect Master Planner (PMP)... and He knows how to orchestrate things in such a way that it leaves you wow-ed! Don't stop believing, God's got you covered!

"And God is able to make all grace abound toward you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work" - 2Corinthians 9:8

Do you have personal questions or would like to be featured on this series? Please feel very free to contact me, I love it when you do! xx

Email - oneplustheone@gmail.com
Follow me on twitter too! - @1plustheOne