Friday, 24 April 2009

Pass You By - A Boyz II Men Lesson

So I was doing my blog- round with some Boyz II Men playing softly in the background.. I was reading all the comments for my last post (thanks for your comments guys!) Yeah so, this song by BoyZ II Men came up and when I heard the chorus I was like wow so true.. Recently I have been reading/hearing how ladies go through this "wrong love" syndrome.. It's as old as old itself and the funny thing is one would have thought that by now we all will be wiser...I'm sure guys also go through this albeit very rarely..

So why do ladies "stick it out" with a guy that maltreats them? There are many "good" reasons that have been given for staying in such a relationship..."Oh I love him so much", "it's really not that bad, it's only when I upset him or when he is angry/drunk/depressed", "he loves me a lot that's why he acts like that when he gets jealous", "I'm the one that he really loves, the other girls are the ones who keep running after him", "it's normal in all relationships, every one has up and down moments"......too many reasons/excuses, yet all not valid for staying with someone who would end up killing you deep inside...
So here are excerpts from the song, it's self-explanatory really,

"Don't have to stay with someone

That makes you cry

You'll end up killing all the love you have inside

Can't hope to see the sun

If you don't open your eyes

Girl don't let real love pass you by"

If he makes you cry, if he makes you sad, if he makes you lose your self esteem, leave, don't stay with him... If he makes you an emotional yoyo- high one second and so low the next- he is slowly killing the essence of you.. No one should ever be allowed to do that to you. Sad thing is if you stay with him, you will miss out on the opportunity to open your eyes and your heart to another person worthy of your love.

It's funny how we think "its him or no other", trust me, you would never find out the truth if you continue to stay with him...remember just as the saying goes .." a child thinks his father's farm is the biggest and the best until he goes out and sees the neighbours".. You can definately do better..

The beginning of the song talks about how amazing the girl was

"She was like nothing I'd ever known

Her eyes shine like diamonds, in a field of snow"...

YOU ARE A STAR, PRICELESS, BEAUTIFULLY AND WONDERFULLY CREATED.. You need to be with someone who not only knows and says it but makes you feel that way..You need a man who would celebrate you just as you do to him. Don't settle for any less...

"You can see the glow slowly fading from her eyes

Though she denies her pain and her dismay"

A good man makes you feel like you can "touch the sky" just as Celine Dion sang but the wrong one takes away the sparkle from your eyes, you become a shadow of yourself.. if he does that to you, please don't stay. there's potential in you that the right sort of loving releases, don't deny your destiny the opportunity to manifest.. don't deny yourself the experience of true joy and fulfillment..

Rememember, you deserve a good man, it's not only a select few that are destined to be loved, EVERYONE is entitled to it, don't let him cheat you out of it, more importantly, don't cheat yourself.. It's a decision you have to make. It may seem hard or even impossible but do yourself a favour... If you don't take off the rag, you would not be able to wear the princely robe, if you don't let it go, the good man waiting round the corner would pass you by...

God wants only the best for you...let it go and let Him show you what real love is

Here's the song....


  1. GIRRRRLLL! That is my song! Great post!

  2. i love that songg..

    wonderful post.. thanks for the advice.

  3. Very expressive writing and I think I married every single member of Boyz II Men in a past life! :)

  4. I really needed that. Im so glad that I read it. Thanx

  5. love this post..
    love the song...
    i hve been there o...dis one is true talk!
    girls flee from such o

  6. lol, yes oo free from such oo
    Thanks for the comments! xx

  7. I know what you mean, Sad as it is these things are hard.

    The human being is such a funny and weird creature.

    We have adaptation tendencies for every we stay put and adapt until it's almost too late.

    Some people are strong enough to up and leave asap, but most others just adapt.

    "tis called Human Nature


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