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Thursday, 14 August 2014

Conversations with One - Let's Get 'Mushy': Things That Made You Go "Awww"

Welcome to Conversations with One Vol 5!!

Basically, Conversations with One is a new chat-series on the blog. Each week, my wonderful friends and I bring you snippets of our 'round-table' discussions from a male/female perspective.. We talk about any and every thing!!

Ladies! Have you ever wanted to get into the mind of a guy? (I know I do! lol), and for guys, I bet once in a while you wish you could just read her mind! Well hopefully week after week, we get to bridge that gap!

You can have a look at last week's conversation where we discussed 'What's the Deal with Us'. You can also have a read of previous 'episodes' HERE.

This week we decided to get a little bit mushy up in here!
Definition of mushy - Excessively sentimental.. Emotional, saccharine, sugary..  (Source: Google)

We asked the question:

"What is the nicest gesture/most romantic thing someone of the opposite sex has done for you?"

This week, apart from reminiscing about great gestures, it is also an avenue to give ideas to people (particularly men, lol). You see, some people are clueless when it comes to romance or doing something memorable for their loved one. Hopefully, you will get a truck load of ideas after reading today's conversation!

I hope you would also share your memorable experience in the comment box, and even more, please do so and more in your relationships! Keep the fire of romance alive!
Enjoy!


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Ms Hope: I love a guy who can sometimes wake me in bed with a savoury smell of breakfast. Even if he isn't a fantastic cook‎ he can keep it simple with a cup of steaming green tea and sandwiches. Lucky me, my husband is a PRO in the kitchen, so when I'm a good girl, lol, I get breakfast, lunch or dinner treats.

 Pic source
Breakfast in bed is always a good idea for your spouse
A few romantic things I've done (I must say so myself, right? Lol) I composed, and produced a song for my husband which I mimed for him on our wedding day, also on‎ our 5th wedding anniversary, I published a book titled '101 Things I Love About You'. I detailed all those small, seemingly negligible everyday things he does that makes him rock my world. 

One: I love what you did for your husband - beautiful idea - 101 Things I Love about You :-)

Mr JohnNash: Personally material things don't get to me. However a few girls have shocked me in the past.
One of my amazing ex-girlfriends gave me a book on how I became a Manchester United star. It was specially made for me from the ManU store. That was touching and I won't forget it in a hurry.

Another girl gave me a statue of Steve Jobs. If you know me well, then you will know I blushed.

I think sometimes we make the mistake of giving people what we want for them as opposed to what they want or need.

On the flip side, whenever I want to get a girl something. I don't decide a week before or a day before. I listen to the unspoken words for months. Then I give a gift that she NEEDs when she is NOT EXPECTING. The impact is always colossal.

Mr NumeroUno: I would like to assume that one or two of us might have read the book by Gary D. Chapman 'The 5 Love Languages'. In brief there are 5 Primary love Languages:

1. Acts of Service
2. Words of Affirmation
3. Gifts
4. Physical Touch
5. Quality Time

I encourage those who have not read it to fetch a copy on Amazon or online.

For me, I cherish the time when I had a tooth ache and this certain young lady knowing she could do very little sent voice notes with her soft voice praying for God to soothe it lol.
Or that simple question; 'have you eaten?...what did you eat?' etc. 

So for people like me, words of affirmation and acts of services is an A+ 

Taking extra care of him when ill/down is very special. Men also want to know they are cared for
Ms MIA: I love the 5 love languages! I haven't read the book but  read about each language on google and it makes sense!

I'm like NumeroUno, 'Words of Affirmation' and 'Acts of Service' are my languages.
Oh and someone suggested to add 'Food' as the sixth...hahaha! I think so too.

For me, there are 3 significant gestures I remember most:

One was my now ex who paid me a surprise visit in Uni on the day I finished my final exams to say congratulations......yayyyy! And he was looking 'smoking hot' and I was going "Yah...that's my man"...lol!

Second was a male close friend who went round Ikeja (Lagos, Nigeria) with me for a whole week, carrying my bag and just looking after me.....phew! Simple but unforgettable.

Third was my Ex who was really broke at the time, yet bought me a designer perfume for Christmas. It was a sacrifice that made sense. Yup...that's it from me!

 Pic Source
Receiving a sacrificial gift is indeed priceless!
Miss Me: Hmm, for me the nicest gesture in terms of material things would be getting me something that you know that I need especially if hints have been dropped! It's good to know that you're listening!! And I don't mind surprises, I like it when he buys me something that he knows I would like because he knows me well enough!! Basically buying things that I have said I want and buying things I have not said I want, but would like!!! {Impossible standard much?!?! :)}

For non-material things similar to NumeroUno, I am all for making sacrifices. Things where it's obvious that you've taken me into consideration. Also I like knowing that there is nothing too much for me to ask you to do! Simples!!!!

One: Wow!! I loved reading all the responses.. I was like aww and was surprised at some of the simple things that left a huge impression on people... It got me thinking!
Interestingly, I was going to mention the 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman too! If you haven't read it, please do!

For me, gestures carry more weight based on how I feel about the person doing it + the element of sacrifice + being able to make me feel special (don't we all want to! lol).

There was a guy I dated once. It was the first time my birthday would coincide with me being in a relationship so it would have been nice to celebrate with him but we lived in different cities and he had important things to do which he was leading the night before and the night of my birthday! Anyways, I told him not to honestly bother, I understood and we could do it some other time but he insisted on coming because he knew it was important to me. .. So he took the last train, to ensure he got in a little after midnight, took me out for 'Birthday breakfast' and left afterwards. It was not convenient for him and I appreciated the sacrifice immensely! Quality time + Acts of Service =Ticked all the boxes.
Oh another thing is letters!! I LOVE reading / letters. When he bought gifts and cards, I would rush to the cards first because I couldn't wait to read what he wrote - the dude was amazing with words!! They say women are moved by what they hear - Hearing/reading his affirmations made my day! I never got tired of reading his reassurance of how he felt. I absolutely loved it :-)

Women are moved by words, you'd be surprised at how far a love note goes to making her feel special!

Ms MIA: *CoughCough* nice one One! I'm really loving this Conversation, especially responses from the guys, picking up some important tips.

Mr Ogbomosho: This topic is Hot Mehn!!!

Romantic tinz?!!!!! Erm..

This topic got me thinking, what really is my love language? Truly I knew only one of them but I thought it would be nice to know which is my weakest, as marriage counsellors will say you will always most likely get the opposite of you which means my weakest love language might be my wife's. God help!!!!!

How can you find out your strongest and weakest Love language I hear someone ask?
well click on the link below:
http://www.5lovelanguages.com/profile/

So whats the most romantic thing I have done or anyone done for me that sticks. I wouldn't say I am romantic like that but... I once asked a girl out long time ago back in the days and took her to this lovely wonderful place on our first date....BURGER KING!!!!!!! I was glad she found the funny side to it otherwise... lol. 
We then went to the park and yeah... Lets just say there was some live music involved too. (#livemusic#rehearsal#)

One: Loll @ Burger King - I think I would like to ask the girl what she thought :-). I guess the live music must have redeemed you!

Every girl needs to be serenaded at least once in a lifetime :-) Live Music always wins! If you can, do it yourself, if you can't, hire someone :-)

Ms Angel: Hahaha.. Umm...I'm a ridiculously romantic girl *hides face*
So I love flowers (although they die within max 2 days cos I don't know how to maintain them lol), and going out to eat (from Nandos to KFC....who you're with is what makes it nice and memorable. Plus everyone likes chicken lol)

The most romantic thing for me was getting a perfumed teddy bear on Valentine's Day.... With perfume! :) *sigh* I love perfume.

Also, a while ago, I went to the cinema during the week and my friend was late (as usual), and I was waiting for AGES)...so he got me flowers. I thought that was cute. I was smiling for days cause nobody had ever gotten me flowers before...For any reason lol.

There's something feminine about flowers. Give her some today!
I guess what I'm saying in conclusion is that anything that anyone of the opposite sex does is amazing when I see that they have gone out of their way to do it.

One: *shock gasp* Ms Angel, so you are romantic! Some people can form 'not bothered'! lol.. Awww that's cute! I think flowers are just beautiful!! :-)... You're very right, it IS the thought behind the action that matters.

Ms PumpkinUnited: Two things I'd never forget in a hurry:

One time I really wanted this Kindle Fire HD tab but couldn't get it at the time cause I was saving up for my fees. So my dear bestie at that time, (he's now progressed to boo of life) surprised me on one particularly depressing night with the Kindle Fire tab hidden under my pillow in my absence.. This sure brought tears to my eyes cause at that time because I knew he was really broke, he gave what he didn't have just for me to get what I wanted.. for me it was like 'blood sacrifice' looll.. 

Another one was when I was really down with flu, couldn't sleep at all or eat and then he took me to his place and nursed me back to health, one of the nights I woke up and wanted nothing else but that strawberry flavoured tea in my house and he had to jog to my house around 2am to get it for me (talk of catching a grenade for me), infact I wanted to fall ill again sef .. there's been countless but these two really standout.. it was the most romantic thing ever.
#OkBye

2am run to fulfil a craving is definitely a keeper! Sacrifices say a lot in love
One: Awww *sniff sniff*. Amen @boo of life! He definitely deserved that promotion lol
Infact I need to turn this conversation into a book! I love all the gestures and I bet it would be a best-seller lol..
I think for couples, recounting these special moments with each other help to build your relationship. Sometimes it's easy to forget the nice things and focus on what's not happening.

You can invent the game 'Remember that time....'... Definitely a nice date-night idea with your spouse! :-)

So, ladies and gentlemen, you've read our experiences, it would be great to read yours too! More importantly, rekindle the romance in your relationship, do something special for that loved one! xxxx

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The Author of Romance is God Himself.. "But God demonstrates His own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us" Rom 5:8 - What a God!

Do you have any question? Please do not hesitate to ask!
Email - oneplustheone@gmail.com
Twitter - @1plustheone
Facebook - www.facebook.com/1plustheone

26 comments:

  1. Awww!!!...am loving these convo series.
    The major pick up line is the beautiful things in life mostly comes from those lil things we may take for granted.
    I love Nash's responses.

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  2. Really great gestures..some of them i went 'wow' some i went 'awww'. either ways am single now but i shall def apply some when am in a relationship..

    For me though i remember one time i was ill and was craving peppersoup my ex then bf at the time sent me pepper soup..and what really made me go 'awww' was the fact that we both lived at opposite ends of London and i know the cost of cab from his end to my end...i thought it was a really nice thing to do.

    www.mchantella.blogspot.com

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  3. I need to read that book...thanks guys for reminding me of gratitude and sacrifices....it's a shame i took things for granted now i have start afresh

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  4. Enjoyed this! Was that you in the video Ayo?

    My top love language is Quality Time followed by words of Affirmation.

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  5. @Gracie, you're very right... It's sometimes the little things that make an unforgettable impact..
    @Chantel, Hiya! Welcome to the blog, thanks for stopping by! Aww, God bless the Peppersoup dude - very thoughtful.. And yes, file away for when the time comes to unleash :-)
    @Ugo, You should read that book dear! It's a blessing! Don't worry, the new shall surely surpass the old in Jesus name.. Enjoy your new beginning xx
    @HF, Thanks hun.. Is that me in the video?! Hmmm... Lol.. Let me stop messing around - yeah, it is me in the video! xx

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  6. I think I should read this book....hmm....

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  7. Awww...that's all I kept saying reading the convo. Well for me I don't like surprises but if you do,I just keep screaming and blushing. I'm more of an act of service and receiving gifts kind of person. I remember this one time I really wanted a camera and I didn't have money and I knew boo was very broke but I kept believing and hoping. So one day boo came to pick me up for church and immediately I entered the car, I saw a white nylon at the back seat. If you know me well,you would know that I like scooping around... I'm the greatest FBI ever so he knew that Moby will see something, go through it and then do gbeborun about it.. So I saw the nylon and my gbeborun FBI antenna stood up immediately and I checked...lo and behold,it was the camera I've been praying bout. I just kept screaming and hitting the poor boy. I almost cried sef but I didn't *baddest chick ever liveth*. I'm the worst person you want to be with when I'm ill. Even me I hate being around me when I'm ill. So if anyone decides to stay with me during that period,then you have my love forever..

    www.mylifeasmoby.com

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  8. LOL @Amusu's "baddest chick ever liveth"
    I can form like that too oh!

    But the most romantic things I've ever gushed over are the things done with a lot of tenderness and thoughtfulness:

    Example
    A good friend of mine once sacrificed his computer hard disc for me at a time I was really in need, and I couldn't contain myself.

    Or is it the hourly call from a friend far from town on my birthday to find out how I was spending my the day...

    Or the listening ear from a friend- he remembered every single detail days after our conversation!

    Or a good friend of mine that takes time to read, edit and showcase my blog...

    In all, it could be any normal thing really, but it's the heart behind it and the tender loving care the moves me in 'awwwing' ways!

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  9. @Erniesha, you should! I will definitely recommend it + I was looking forward to reading your experience! You haven't finished ma'am, come backkkkk!
    @Moby, hahaha! I smiled and laughed reading your comment! Are you sure your FBI skills are berra than mine lol.. But nah, I am leaning back so that I can fully appreciate surprises.. Lovely gesture by boo though.. I hope you get so wowed soon that the tears come out and spoil your bad girl creed hahaha.. Thanks for the warning, I wouldn't come near if you're ill, I will love/pray from afar! lol xx
    Thanks for your comments ladies! xx

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  10. Awww Debby! Love it! I totally get you.. It's the heart behind the action that tells the value of it.. Anything coud be romantic (even drinking garri together) when it's done with the right person and with the right heart!... You find yourself saying "Aww, then he brought the garri and made sure he found the coldest water to make it even more special.. And then when I thought it was over, he produced the groundnuts to seal the deal!" lol..

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  11. Ok Ayo, I'll share a kind gesture from someone of the opposite sex:)

    I remember one night years ago my girlfriend and I had taken a Greyhound bus from a neighboring city back into New Orleans and arrived around midnight at the station. Now the person who had agreed to pick us up didn't show up and we were practically stranded - we didn't know who to call. I was searching through my phone for someone to call and everyone was unavailable. In a last desperate attempt, I decided to call my friend J that I hadn't seen or spoken to in a long time. I honestly didn't expect him to say yes but to my utter surprise he said it was no problem and he was on his way. Now this might seem like a basic favor but there are a few other factors involved: a. J had to get up and drive from his house to the train station b. The distance from the train station back to where we were staying (another neighboring city) was over 30 minutes. c. J had to drive us home and then drive himself back to New Orleans. d. most importantly, although he had to be at work for a long day's shift in just a few hours (5am; I called him around midnight) he was not angry or irritated in the least bit when he picked us up or during the drive. In fact, he was extremely pleasant...and he did not want any money for gas.

    I've never forgotten that the person I expected to show up didn't and the person I never expected would show up, did. I'm truly grateful to J for what he did; mainly his disposition about it. I remember thinking to myself, and still now, that I want to be more and more of a person with the type of generous quality he had:)

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  12. Aww, that's really selfless! God bless J.. So let me tease you a little.. Are you still in contact with him? *romantic hat on* hehe
    I think selfless acts always win! There's something about going out of your way to do something for someone.. It speaks a lot. We must learn to live sacrificially, particularly for people we love xx

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  13. OK, Im going all awwwww, awww, awww...lol.

    My favorite, cos Atala does a lot is our helicopter ride on my birthday, I was literally blown away.

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  14. Awwww, trust Atala to come through in a big way! That's really special. I can only imagine how you felt! :-). Many more pleasant surprises in your home in Jesus name xx

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  15. My love gesture: I lived 200km away from my ex. When I'd visit him over the weekend, I'd write and surprise him by leaving small encouragement notes with Bible verses in his shirt pockets and suit pockets.I enjoyed doing it because it lifted his spirits and I loved coming up with new areas to hide the notes. He would call me everyday excited about a new note he'd found.

    In turn, he always prepared breakfast every Sunday and sometimes cooked dinner on Saturdays. He spoilt me..and gave the best massages esp for my back problem.

    I have another friend who always calls me when I am down. I have depression disorder and he has a nack for calling me just when I am in the pits. talking to him gets me back to good spirits. He is the only friend who calls me on the anniversary of my dad's death to check up on me and lift my spirits. I never forget that

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  16. @Elizabeth, Wow.. I loveee the idea of the bible love notes hidden in different places - I think it's so sweet and impactful too.. (filing that idea away for the future :-)
    And cooking for you, oh la la! I loveeet! lol.. Very nice
    I also want to pray that God will heal you of every disorder in Jesus name. May His joy bubble right from your inside out in Jesus name. Thank God for your lovely friend.
    Thanks a lot for stopping by dear xx

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  17. Well for me, I went to a friends grad and thought we had missed our train back. One of our friend's friend (tongue twister) went to buy us fresh train tickets without even telling us. That was really nice.

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  18. Awwwww.....these are soo sweet!!! So so sweet.
    I remember the day I got back from NYSC camp and YY came to my house with a pack of panties and a bottle of perfume......truth is, I had literally thrown away all the panties I took with me to camp.I didnt want to bring them back home. It was suprised cos I didnt tell him about it.....or the time he got me a phone and wrapped it up, telling me it was shortbread and I stuck it in the fridge, still wrapped. This is inspiring a blog post!

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  19. All these romantic pipu sef. Hmmm...

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  20. @MissyTee, Aww, that's a really nice gesture.. I understand the dilemma of missing a train! lol
    @HD!! Up YY.. How did he know though?! I look forward to your post :-) {Please post quickly oh!) xx
    @ilola, lol.. Ahn ahn babes, are you not romantic ni? All these hard chic (forming) pipu sha! hehehe

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  21. i like the "101 things I like about you book". Lol @ilola. don't mind them jare.
    www.themanecaptain.blogspot.ca

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  22. A friend once gave me a suprise birthday gift. He lived at another end of town but came to my end in school around 5am in the morning, sweet talked the gate man to drop a cake and a birthday goody bag in front of my door. I opened the door around 7am to go do stuff and was so shocked!! That was really cute.

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  23. @The ManeC, lol.. You people are probably the mushiest of them all lol
    @Tamie, Awwwwww! That's super nice and thoughtful.. What a lovely thing to wake up to!

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  24. I said lemmie come here and show face so that you know I was here. hehe

    It was an interesting read. I guess the Love languages should be a book on the list. We'll see :)

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  25. I said lemmie come here and show face so that you know I was here. hehe

    It was an interesting read. I guess the Love languages should be a book on the list. We'll see :)




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    Replies
    1. Lol.. Thanks dear for leaving your mark *big hug*
      Yes please, that book is a must read!

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