We are back!!!!
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| Yup, that's how happy we are to be back! :-D |
A little introduction for first-timers:
Conversations with One is a chat-series on the blog.
Each week, the 1 + TheOne panel (made up of beloved and very wise friends with a variety of personalities) and I bring you snippets of our 'round-table' discussions from a male/female perspective.. We talk about any and every thing!!
Ladies! Have you ever wanted to get into the mind of a guy? (I know I do! lol), and for guys, I bet once in a while you wish you could just read her mind! Well hopefully week after week, we get to bridge that gap!
You can have a look at the last conversation where in the spirit of the month of Praise, we thanked God for 'missed opportunities'. You can read it and other previous episodes HERE.
Each week, the 1 + TheOne panel (made up of beloved and very wise friends with a variety of personalities) and I bring you snippets of our 'round-table' discussions from a male/female perspective.. We talk about any and every thing!!
Ladies! Have you ever wanted to get into the mind of a guy? (I know I do! lol), and for guys, I bet once in a while you wish you could just read her mind! Well hopefully week after week, we get to bridge that gap!
You can have a look at the last conversation where in the spirit of the month of Praise, we thanked God for 'missed opportunities'. You can read it and other previous episodes HERE.
This week on Conversations with One *cue music*:
Many of us have heard that popular song by the Nigerian artiste that explains that his love-interest is not bothered about material things, but just wants his love.. Now this week, let's discuss:
"How Important is Money in Relationships?"
Now this topic is really broaddddd! But I hope we can narrow it down with some questions:1. Is it possible to have a successful relationship (courting or married) when money is absent or when it's in excess?
2. Should money be present before you consider marriage?
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Personally, I feel money is a very important matter in relationships o! We all say that line "money is not everything" or "don't marry or date someone because of money" but erm... Who wants to date a broke guy. lol
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| Broke but cute... Any takers? |
One: Question of life!! lol
Ms PYT: I think it's going to be difficult to have a successful relationship without investing financially in it. No matter how little or how broke the guy or girl is, they must at least buy birthday gifts etc. You can't be singing "I'm broke" everyday now!
I'm seriously thinking on how best to explain this money issue because it's a broad topic, maybe I'll just answer the points you raised.
Is it possible to have a successful relationship when money is absent? AT FIRST, yes, but having in mind that money will be present in the next few years, maybe the guy is still a student and you know he'll finish soon and get a job but when the guy is just a broke guy and you don't see any sign of him making it, abeg flee! To be honest nobody wants to suffer.
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| It's the thought that counts.. Yes/No? |
Ms UTA: Hmmm, the Bible says a man should provide for his family, that's why it says a man unable to provide for his family is worse than an infidel because I believe he brings shame to God (1Tim 5:8). Therefore, every man who desires to have a family must be diligent, get a good education/learn a good trade, use his God-given gift because no one was sent to this earth by Baba God without a gift/talent to enhance his/her income. No woman, I repeat, no woman will be happy if there is no money to care for the home and children.
Let me share a real-life story. There's this married couple that the husband has not worked for almost throughout the duration of their marriage (over 15years!). His reason? He is very qualified and has not seen a job commensurate to his qualification hence he cannot demean himself in that manner (Did I hear you say what??!) - True story. As you can imagine, it is mega frustrating for his wife and has affected their marriage very negatively! Wife has had to look after the home and children with no support from her husband. You cannot imagine the frustration of going to work from morning to night and coming home to meet your husband in the same spot you left him, day after day!!
| Day after day after day! *Arghhh* |
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| This is the story of some people... |
To be honest, some men are just irresponsible - and hide it under different excuses! A responsible man would do any kind of job to provide for his family!
One: Wow, can qualification feed a family?! I cannot imagine being in that position.. I have always said that for me, if a guy is too selective about a job (when he is dire need), alarm bells start ringing! There was a guy I admired a lot and would marry just because he was a serious hustler! Nothing was too 'below him' to do.. In my mind, I was thinking "if I end up with this man, I know that I will not go hungry!" lol.. Today, he is very comfortable - but he paid his dues!
| Ok, ignore the 'Doll' bit but even a boy knows that diligence pays! |
Mr JohnNash: Guys I have learnt again and again, marriage comes after work. Notice I did not use the word job. God gave Adam work before he created Eve. I think the guy must be involved in something, passionate about something, engaged in an area which will eventually bring returns. Please do not marry while seeking employment oh!!!
Ms TrueTalk: Money matters! Even the bible says 'money answereth all things'! (Ecc 10:19); at the same time it says 'The love of money is the root of all evil'! (1Tim 6:10) So, what does one do? Spend money, need money, but don't let it become your god!
In a relationship, you need money to buy gifts, no matter how little. Even if you don't have money at first, there must be a plan, job or contract to make money in the near future. Not having money can be a sign of laziness in some cases.
I do not expect the man to be 'super-rich', but he should have sufficient funds to meet basic needs like food, clothing, shelter and others. Having more for things like vacations, luxury cars etc will definitely be a plus.
One: I think even for ladies, being broke in a relationship is tough business! To be honest, it's quite limiting... You keep wishing upon a star..
In a relationship, you need money to buy gifts, no matter how little. Even if you don't have money at first, there must be a plan, job or contract to make money in the near future. Not having money can be a sign of laziness in some cases.
I do not expect the man to be 'super-rich', but he should have sufficient funds to meet basic needs like food, clothing, shelter and others. Having more for things like vacations, luxury cars etc will definitely be a plus.
One: I think even for ladies, being broke in a relationship is tough business! To be honest, it's quite limiting... You keep wishing upon a star..
| Lol.. That's right! |
Miss Me: In a relationship setting I think that finance is an area where both should be willing to make sacrifices. So if one is not quite as "rich" as the other, then you should be able to cover the one you're in a relationship with. However, it's also unreasonable for us girls to demand more from a guy than he's able to!! In a marriage setting, really the finances should be equal territory!
Ms MIA: Hmmmm....This one is tricky! I say that because my father will not even listen to you if you bring a man that has no stable source of income no matter how small. He always says that there has to be a fall back somewhere.
Also, the presence of money is relative. If it means whether marriage can occur where the man is jobless, I will say yes. I've seen it happen but I will ONLY 'enter' if that man has a vision. I must also state that I must know that God is leading me there. You know it's easier to hear God when all the desired criteria are present...lol!
Seriously though, I think that a couple make up their financial purse together, therefore I'm working hard as he will be doing, to increase our finances. I will only go into that marriage if I know that the man is going somewhere; a man who puts his hand to work no matter how small - No shady or dodgy deals but he's not ashamed to work his socks off to provide for his family. A responsible man!
Also, the presence of money is relative. If it means whether marriage can occur where the man is jobless, I will say yes. I've seen it happen but I will ONLY 'enter' if that man has a vision. I must also state that I must know that God is leading me there. You know it's easier to hear God when all the desired criteria are present...lol!
Seriously though, I think that a couple make up their financial purse together, therefore I'm working hard as he will be doing, to increase our finances. I will only go into that marriage if I know that the man is going somewhere; a man who puts his hand to work no matter how small - No shady or dodgy deals but he's not ashamed to work his socks off to provide for his family. A responsible man!
Mr Motivation: I am really looking forward to the contributions relating to the topic. Frankly, speaking, in as much as money should not be the sole object in relationships/marriages, I feel strongly that finances have a role to play in determining how 'sweet' a relationship/marriage will be. Often times I feel that men in particular believe that they must have billions before they can make a woman happy and so they shy away from giving little treats and waiting for when the money is complete in order to blow her mind with something special. But guess what, something will come up and chop that money....hahaha. I feel that when the most of little is well utilised, a right thinking lady would appreciate it no matter how little (ladies pls tell me I am right) except if her eyes are like 1999 Model of E- Class (aka Okpolo eye)....lol
| Eyes wide like a Mercedes E--Class (1999) lol |
Mr JohnNash: I think the first question we need to ask ourselves is: What is a successful marriage/relationship? Lets make a logical assumption that a successful marriage or relationship is the one in which both parties are happy and flourishing.
Based on the above, my answer is NO to the absence of money in a marriage or relationship. The woman might endure the absence of money and stay by your side but you will know she's not happy. I would rather be single than see the woman I love unhappy.
Based on the above, my answer is NO to the absence of money in a marriage or relationship. The woman might endure the absence of money and stay by your side but you will know she's not happy. I would rather be single than see the woman I love unhappy.
One: Aww, give me a handkerchief, Nash has gone all emotional on us *sniff sniff* (ok, don't shoot me please lol)
Ms Hope: People of God, the love of money is the root of all evil, but mbok, the lack of money is the genesis of disrespect.
LOL.. Thanks for keeping it short and sweet Ms Hope..
So, ladies and gentlemen, is that a proverb that is worth adhering to? What's your take on it? Please leave your comments and let us conver-sate! xx
PS Thanks for the loveee and mention on your BLOG JDB!
PS Thanks for the loveee and mention on your BLOG JDB!
I got married a couple of weeks after graduation with no job at hand but my wife believed in me. Two weeks after our wedding I got a job, fast forward to a month later I got another job with twice the salary of my first job.
ReplyDeleteNote though that I was convinced God wanted us to get married at that point and He proved himself faithful.
Conclusion: Money is important but God's prompting takes priority.
Thanks a lot for your comment.
DeleteVery very good conclusion.. God's prompting has to always supercede all other things.
Thank God for a wife who believed in you and your future..
Also, remember the bible says that when a man finds a wife, he finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord..
I have to say that I love your blog.
ReplyDeleteYour name yes, and this idea, it is one that I have not seen before and I have to say that it is really good. Your friends are so interesting, funny and quirky.
I agree with all of them
Thanks a lot Funmi and welcome to the blog! Thanks a lot for stopping by!!
DeleteMy friends are truly wonderful.. May God bless them indeed in Jesus name.. xx
"Conclusion: Money is important but God's prompting takes priority"- I agree with the first commenter.
ReplyDeleteI will never date a broke dude or someone who is really careless about his finances. My parents are against a man getting married without a job or a business and at worst without a house...AH!
I love guys that are ambitious and diligent no matter how little their means of livelihood may be. I once had an intended le boo in 2011, he was even pestering for marriage and all, hian! I tried to even hear him out and asked what his plans for the future were. the guy worked with a bank at that time and I was surprised he had no plans aside from the bank job. he did not come to me as THE ONE at all. he didn't even impact my life in anyway. even though he pestered for long, I just did not bulge at all. fast forward a year later, he lost his bank job and was back to square one. it took him a long time to recover from it.
My point is every guy should work at least lay your hands on doing something legally not like you will be shouting "There is no job o, things are hard". I will respect a guy who fries puff puff at Berger to earn a living than a lazy bone who will be shouting he has no job.
Money is very important in relationship...Enough said.
Thanks Ayo for the convo series, I've missed it gan.
My darling Grace!!!!
DeleteWell said, very well said... This quote right here makes a lot of sense "I will respect a guy who fries puff puff at Berger to earn a living than a lazy bone who will be shouting he has no job"... *hi5*
I just dont gerrit..
I love the picture at the top! Looks like a fun, warm and friendly group of friends! Wow the guy really jumped high! Would love to know who is who, but well I guess we're not supposed to know ;)
ReplyDeleteOkay concerning your topic!! Most things are clear: don't marry a sluggard - talk honestly about $ - have a plan etc. I agree with all of that.
One thing that I don't agree with though is what one girl posted: "well a luxury car would be a nice extra." I see her point BUT... I don't quite know if that is what we're made for. Yes, God is not against us enjoying life, but most spiritual people in the Bible were quite poor! Jesus himself walked around, didn't have a proper home. Paul was just a tentmaker and tried to make ends meet. The prophets needed godly provision to survive. The disciples were poor fishermen. Yeah, Solomon was rich, but his wealth (and the women ;)) led him astray...
What I am trying to say is that God did not promise us to have the perfect-super-rich-life with luxury cars, fancy meals everyday, etc. In the book of Hebrews we are reminded that we are only sojourners on this earth, our home is a heavenly one. If we focus too much on having our own private comfortable happiness (either as a single or as a couple), then we might not sin, but we miss the point.
In simple terms it's this: If a guy works hard, makes ends meet and pays the bills, you should be fine. Don't expect too much extra - God never promised us ferrari, designer etc. (btw love the song ;)). Put God's kingdom first, everything else will just follow.
I am not saying it is easy!! I myself struggle with this. But I try not to "cling" too firmly to earthly stuff. I try not to window-shop, only buy things I think I need, don't compare myself with others etc. The more stuff I own, the more I have to maintain it and the greater the danger that second things become first things. So I try to be cautious with what I buy. That is something that couples should also talk about - not just about income, but about spending habits. Otherwise you might end up in soup. Okay, novel finished, just my 2cts ;) Take care and God bless all of you!!
Sebs! I was looking forward reading your comment and you didn't disappoint.. Thanks a lot, as always very deep and valid points :-)
DeleteTry guessing who is who in the picture :-D
I hear what you are saying.... However, saying that, are believers meant to be ambitious? To aspire for luxury where possible?
Remember the bible talks about wealth in many places, in fact the Israelites were known to be very wealthy and prosperous people because God made it so.. It's on record that Isaac sowed in the land and prospered and was very great until he became very great.
Solomon is the richest King who ever lived and this blessing was from God.
Remember David? The house of God he provided for before he died had all manner of precious stones.
The bible also states in 3John 2 that "Beloved, I wish above all things that thou mayest prosper and be in health even as thy soul prospereth".. Now, the key word is that it is important first of all that your soul prospers! Like Ms TrueTalk said, meeting the basic needs is important but luxury will be a bonus (not that without it, we wouldn't survive)..
Also Sebs, I think one of the panel members mentioned that the love of money is the root of all evil - that's in the bible too..
Do we make money a god/idol in our lives? No way! That would be such a terrible waste of a resource that God has given to us freely and to be able to meet neeeds..
As Christians, if we don't have money, how would we intervene in mission areas? Build churches? Give to the poor?
Hmmm.. It's a very dicey topic but I would say like you very rightly said, as long as money does not become your main focus or something that we cling firmly too (even at the risk of where we end up after we die), then please by all means pray to be blessed by God and use that blessing to glorify His name.
"The Lord shall open unto thee his good treasure, the heaven to give the rain unto thy land in his season, and to bless all the work of thine hand: and thou shalt lend unto many nations, and thou shalt not borrow" Deut 28:12 - I like that promise :-) :-)
Ayo I just wanted to THANK you a lot for taking your time to comment my comment in such a balanced, friendly and biblical way. =)
DeleteWell, if I were up for a big discussion, I would counter your argument by stating that most blessings in the NEW testament (which is kind of the foundation for Christians, rather than the OT, which is more like a prologue to the NT) are spiritual, not material (Ephesians 1: Blessed be the God [...] who has blessed us in Christ with every SPIRITUAL blessing in the heavenly places").
But I think we both have our points and there are no absolutes. God gives some people a lot of money, like you rightly said (e.g. David, Abraham) and it is our task to be good stewards! Like in Mt 25 when the people get different amounts of talents and Jesus wants us not to bury our talent. Churches, missions, etc. they all depend on money, very true! So let us learn to be good stewards of our money, time, talents and use them to the glory of God and the good of others. Based on your blog I can tell that you make good use of your writing and relational skills, so keep it up, my sista in d Lord! :-)
Sebs you are a very wise guy. God bless you. More wisdom (money) in Jesus name; Not sure which one you prefer - Just kidding anyways. Thanks and God bless
DeleteVery wise man... Thank you very much Sebs..
DeleteVery true.. There are blessings that are far greater than money (money is actually a tool to be used..) and that's what we pray for.. Blessings that money cannot buy..
God bless your wise and wonderful heart Sabba Sabba :-)
Money is important o. Personally, I would not like to go with a guy that is already made. I like a guy with a vision we can both run with, and then money comes from that. Nothing takes the place of a purpose-driven guy jare. That man mentioned in the marriage above is just lazy and irresponsible.
ReplyDeleteIt is important oo Atilola! lol
DeleteNothing takes the place of a purpose-driven guy!
Like a comment on Facebook expressed, if you go with someone without vision who is rich today, if anything happens in the future, what happens?!
I agree, it's all shades of laziness.. As the Bible says, "The lazy man says 'There is a lion in the road'" Prov 26:13 ... excuses excuses! lol
Very important subject. As much as we are aware that it takes two to make a relationship, it takes the same two to make the relationship a success. I am aware that biblically like we saw in Adam, he tilled the ground, he worked hard fulfilling his design as the man. In a case where the man fails to fulfil his basic obligation of ensuring that his woman and their overall well-being is catered for, the end result could be a strained relationship. It is very important that the two people involved sit down and have a finance talk; where are we now, where are we going and how do we plan to get there? I do understand that most times the ladies get worked up if her man lives below expectation in this regard. I would suggest that it is important she knows her man,; what are his dreams, what is he doing daily, what efforts is he putting in making sure he fills his responsibility? If this is satisfied I believe it is not a bad idea for the lady to support the relationship as much as she can. As for too much money leading to failure of a relationship, it could happen in two ways: the man may become promiscous as a result hence becoming an offence to his woman and two; the woman may become extravagant which could be a piss off to the man.
ReplyDeleteTo the second question: I do not think two people should wait till they have ALL THE MONIES to get married. Marriage is just like riding on a pathway you charted yourself. I would strongly advice that it is important that proper planning be in place. For instance; if the parties plan to start having kids in about 10 months into the marriage, then it would be highly irresponsible to go ahead and get married when the security of the kids in terms of welfare is not in place. Two people can atleast take care of themselves in marriage but with kids, you have got to prepare and be ready for them as it would be very unfair to bring in kids to the world to suffer.
Nice one!
DeleteIt takes two to make any relationship or marriage work! Particularly, the agreement of two.
Thanks for looking at the issues of money being in excess.. I have seen that ruin some marriages because one or both parties couldn't manage it properly - very sad.
Very wise point... If it's just both os you hustling it out for the first few years, that's great.. It becomes dicey when children come into the mix.. it can get quite frustrating having children and not being able to look after them.
I am all smiles...
DeleteLOL... DUru!!!
Deletefunny enough i was getting my watch cleaned by this elderly man and he made the statement no money no honey lol, but mything is it shouldnt be the center of relationship
ReplyDeleteLol - No money, no honey
DeleteLol.. When you make money the centre/foundation of a relationship, it is doomed to fail to be honest..
DeleteWhat happens when you go through a 'low' period?
This topic is very SENSITIVE...here's my thought:
ReplyDeleteMoney is a vital part of every relationship, it must not be ignored. However, Money should not be one's primary motive for choosing a life partner because money can fly***
If both parties are willing to work things out after confirming they are compatible (Spiritual, Purposefully, Emotionally, Medically, etc) the money issue will be properly managed.
If he has a vision, and a track record of progress being made....don't say no o, if you like him....because the woman who says no to a Man with a Vision, to embrace a Man with Television, will one day watch the Man with a Vision on her husband's Television doing well...lol
"the woman who says no to a Man with a Vision, to embrace a Man with Television, will one day watch the Man with a Vision on her husband's Television doing well..."
DeleteThat cracked me up
Lol. Wise statement
DeleteNice one SaintRhymes!! Welcome and thanks a lot for your comment!
DeleteMoney can seriously fly! I think the bible says that it has wings lol.
As anonymous said above, very wise comment :-)
In today's society, men AND women play a role in providing for the 'home'. However I believe it is important that prior to marriage, a man should have equipped himself be employed or taking the necessary steps to be employable, and has demonstrated that he is a good steward of his resources. Equally the same for women. Both parties are responsible for investing 100% of themselves not only financially, but spiritually and emotionally as well. Any relationship where Money/finances are paramount without an emotional and/or spiritual connection/compatibility is bound to fail. All else being equal (compatibility, emotionally and spiritually) being financially equipped to contribute to pay the bills and provide the basic necessities is very important.
ReplyDeleteVery true.. I like the fact that people are sharing that the presence of money in a relationship/marriage has to be balanced with very key attributes too (many of which money cannot buy)..
DeleteMarriage is a mission, journey etc, it would be very unwise to go into it unprepared or without investing in one's self..
I like the fact that you bring in the woman's role too... What are you bringing to the table ma'am?
I believe that a lot of men would want to know that you are coming in as a blessing, an asset, not a liability (and vice versa)..
Okay mami....I have to say I was looking forward to this after the praise posts......mami....I gotta be honest with you eh....inasmuch as I love my husband, he KNOWS he is NO exception of the punishment>>>> 'By the sweat of your face You will eat bread, Till you return to the ground'....so mami....he NEEDS to put bread on MY table cuz just likes God's punishment for women, he said, 'I will greatly multiply Your pain in childbirth, In pain you will bring forth children; Yet your desire will be for your husband, And he will rule over you.'.....and ruling over me is him providing for my needs......In a situation where my husband can't provide for me, I go with what Ephesians 5:22 says, 'Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord.'........mami...being a subject to my husband means supporting his reign as the head of my household.....it's really easy mami...... Money is VERY IMPORTANT in my home (dunno bout anyone else)....I love nice things alot...I don't have to use them, I just need to have them....and it's my husband's obligation to God and me to provide for me and make me happy....
ReplyDeleteHere is a fact, before I married my husband, Yes!, he was very comfortable...would I have married him if he was not comfortable??....Yes I would!...why?......I would marry him cuz I love him and even though he can't guarantee my security financially, I would help him become the 'Head' of my home.....and when that is done, I will take a step back and let him reign...... (buh that is ONLY if he is not lazy)
If I was dealing with a lazy man, HELL NO!.....I don't do 'lazy' mami......
That's what I think.....Hows you mami...
Tibs Tells Tales
*clicks fingers*.... Pastor Tibs!!! (I have to call you Pastor mami!).. I like your very measured and wise insight /contributions to discussions.. And from experience too, thank you my darling!! (*chop kiss, in Moby's voice lol)
DeleteI like the way you used Ephesians 5:22 to buttress the point.. I hadn't seen it that way..
Choose your partner wisely because according to the bible, for richer, for poorer, you have to be subject to him as unto the Lord!..
Thank God that He has equipped us with such grace to be relentless..
Like Atilola said above, I would take delight in knowing that if I met my husband without much, I am helping him by God's grace to pursue vision and fulfil our potential.. If I meet him with having much, I would be extra delighted to work with him to do even more by God's grace...
The bible says it, I believe it - I am a good thing and any man that finds me as a wife has found a good thing and will obtain favour from the Lord :-)
This is an interesting topic and I love how it is addressed through a panel and different points of view.
ReplyDeleteI personally don't think what matters in a relationship (before marrying the person) is whether he/she has money "right now". But rather, his/her prospects of having a good job. I believe both parties have to be hard-workers. A hard-worker will most likely always have money to spend. It doesn't matter how good looking anyone is, if they are lazy the good looks count for nothing. It doesn't matter if she wants to be a stay-at-home Mum. Raising kids is hard work! It doesn't matter if he wants to start his own business. Running a business is hard work! It doesn't even matter how many degrees a person has, if they are not willing to make the effort necessarily to find a proper job, well, the degrees count for nothing.
Again, great post!
Tell the World
Thanks for your comment Funto and welcome to the blog!!! *rings bell*
DeleteOk.. Your comment brought this scripture to my mind "Seest thou a man diligent in his business? He will stand before Kings and not before mere man" Proverbs 22:29
If one is lazy and rich, somehow somehow, it will be difficult to maintain it (infact lazy and rich is such an oxymoron!)..
If one is hardworking and determined and of course by the grace of God, never underestimate how far that person will go.. It's only a matter of time..
Okay before i say anything.... let me just say Turn up Turn up.... Mr John Nash is back in the building... I was so psyched up to read with more enthusisasm when i saw his name... With all due respect sir, you are a smart Human being, very smart.... I so wanna be like you when k grow up...
ReplyDeleteSo Money... i for one believe that Money is an overly essential part of life, and like Ms Cookie said, no money, no honey. A woman is made from a man, and hence she needs to be catered for BY the man. I am kinda from the old school days, so i am one to believe that no matter how much my woman has, it is my responsibility to take care for her and cater for her, to make her smile, to make her happy. I mean i dont care if she is Dangote my brothers :) daughter, the fact that she is my woman, means i am obliged to spend on her... can Relationships work without money? Hell No, cause Beauty is as much as expensive, as it is pain... Sadly, some folks put money as the center of love, and thats a mistake, God should be the center of how relationships, cause regardless of what we have today (be it little or great) it is only God that can truly make us bigger...Nice one 1+THE ONE, i always look forward to this series with huge expectations. Its my own Dating manual... **shines teeth
P.S: I always respond to peeps and me myself, that i will not marry till i have a mercedes, a house by the lake in Lekki, a house in Abuja, and another in Portharcourt... well this is my reality, and any woman who wants to marry me as I am, is sadly not allowed to... i have at a point in my 22 years 11 months PURPOSELY seen hunger, that i felt my stomach touch my spine, i dont want my Twins and their siblings nor my wife to go through that. They are why i grind. Cheers Bubba.
LOL.. JDBeloved, I passed your message to JohnNash oh! I have said it that there will definitely be introductions soon - you will both hit it off!
ReplyDeleteBut mehn, this your criteria to get married is steep oh! I have no doubt that you can achieve it (because you are one of the most driven men I know + there's proof already), but you have to give room for flexibility eg what if Wajilda wanna get married earlier?! hehehe, I had to throw that in there..
Also, you have to consider that like Atilola mentioned above, some women don't want a 'ready-made' man but would like to build with him.. At least contribute something.
Would you consider being with a woman like that?
My dear, you will not see hunger again in Jesus name xx
Love all the contributions. I came to the party late. This was def a good read.
ReplyDeleteI would also love a someone I would build with. I think it comes with a deeper level of intimacy.
Thanks dear..
DeleteYes, I believe it does.. I feel 'uesless' if I'm in a relationship where I am not quite needed by the man..
Hey ma'am, you've been tagged. Check here; http://www.toinlicious.blogspot.com/2014/10/the-20s-tag.html
ReplyDeleteChecked.. Thanks ma'am.. I shall do the needful :-) xx
DeleteHmm...when I was in Uni, I was proud to consider myself 'not-materialistic'. But I've been a graduate for a while now and I have fully realized that wanting comforts, especially from the hero of your heart, isn't asking for too much. In fact, it's so much easier to respect a man (or woman) who is able to provide. One of the attributes of King Solomon that the 'woman' in his life crooned about was the fact that he was a provider
ReplyDelete"I sit in his delightful shade and taste his delicious fruit
He escorts me to the banquet hall, it's obvious how much he loves me"
SOS 2:3-5
If we would be sincere with ourselves, money is important in a relationship.
I'm definitely a happier person ( for no apparent reason) when we have cash LOL
Oh Thank youuuuu for this beautiful comment! And I am going to keep that scripture.. You know, I never interpreted it that way! lol
DeleteMoney is a form of security. It's one less thing to worry about please..
PS Welcome to the blog and thanks for leaving a comment too dear! xx
ReplyDeleteThis composition discusses the verity about marriage separation and children.
Is It Really Painful?
Divorce with children