The above statement is one that I became quite familiar with personally! You see usually, I lovee having a good time and a laugh! I enjoy doing things in a unique way, doing it differently where possible! I enjoy a good laugh and in the right crowd, my sense of humour is something to write home about lol.. I shine, I sparkle, I smile, I laugh!
These are very attractive qualities in anyone! People see it and are drawn to you! You meet that dude or chic who just wants to be with you all the time because you see, pleasantness is verryy attractive and people want to be with others who bring out the best in them and make them want to shine too - someone who is generally 'fun'!
However, sometimes when we we get into a relationship or commitment, we forget to be the person that made our partners fall in love with us!
I was quite guilty of this and looking back, I detest what I cheated myself of! In the relationship, I was so focused on getting it right, 'fixing' what may be wrong, thinking about whether I was really really sure I had made the right decision, focuing on what wasn't working that I forgot to be the girl he first loved! I became a bore.. Nagging here, mood swings there, "we need to talk" here, demands there.. *yawn* - how massively boring and tiresome!
Sometimes it's the reality of life that gets to us - usually referred to as after the 'honeymoon' stage in marriage! That point where you stopped trying..
Are you at that place right now? Take a moment and chill! When last did you smile in that way that makes people weak in the knees, when was the last time you laughed heartily (try doing it now!), when was the last time you took of that mask of a frown and tilted your lips to a happy bow!! When was the last time you made an effort - made that particular hairstyle, wore that particular dress, made an effort?!
When was the last time you paid them a compliment, wrote a love note, shared a secret, planned a surprise like the old times?
Take your eyes off what's not happening and choose to focus on what's happening and happening well! You deserve to live and enjoy it too! And you deserve to give you and them a break - Life may not always be perfect but it is your decision to make the best of every situation you are in by God's grace.
Be exciting again, be you!
Don't let the pressures of life, new job, children, activities, unmet expectations - take the shine off you.. Be YOU, be beautiful!
So people, any experiences? Any words of wisdom as to how to re-ignite the fire in you? xx
*Special HUGE shout-out to Tosin Oludare of www.msjsbass.blogspot.com for my beautiful ASOS belt (I lovveeeet!) A sweet and beautiful woman! It was a pleasure meeting you yesterday albeit briefly.. God bless you much and reward you richly!!
You have some good messages in here girl!
ReplyDeleteIf we leave a relationship because it became boring, what will do when we get married? Hop from marriage to marriage? Routine sets in, it's life. That is why the commitment bit matters.
ReplyDelete*Nodding* at @ilola's point.....commitment is a decision, a conscious one. Being in a relationship/marriage is not an end, and should not be seen as one....na continuous assessment...work in progress...no place for complacency.
ReplyDeleteI can totally relate to what you're getting at here: if one isn't careful, in trying to take the relationship seriously it's possible to suck all the fun out of it!
ReplyDeleteGood observations. I think this post applies to many areas: relationships, parenting, friendships, ministry, work, you name it... In an effort to appear more mature and wise, we sometimes try to be overly serious, forgetting that there is so much heartfelt joy in all these little moments of day-to-day life, when we just don't take ourselves and our loved ones too seriously.
ReplyDeleteKeep it up, sister!
@Debby, thanks dear! xx
ReplyDelete@ilola, Yes, I agree with you - love is commitment, without it, when life happens one will be unable to cope. However it also takes commitment to work hard at keeping the spark alive..
@HD,It is continuous Assessment indeed.. By God's grace, we wouldnt allow complacency creep in.
@GNG, I've been there! lol.. Change has come by God's grace:-)
@Unclesebbi - You are so right! It applies to all areas.. Even in the waiting period, sometimes one is so anxious for the result that you forget to enjoy the blessings and lessons from that season.. Thanks a lot for stopping by! Really appreciate your comment :-)
Thank you everyone for your comments, I am grateful xxxx
Again another insightful post that strikes a chord! Unclesebbi summarises it perfectly ..."forgetting that there is so much heartfelt joy in all these little moments of day-to-day life".
ReplyDeleteGod bless you for this reminder.
Thank you so much for your comment Creative Works..May God give us the grace to enjoy the gift of today xx
ReplyDelete*Thumbs up*
ReplyDeleteI love how you are so sincere, you can be sha, you are anon anyway, but seriously, these are stuffs we get trapped in most times in relationships, we forget who we are and turn into the sad, 'smilesless' chick..but no more, we'll keep our liveliness and joy next time and retrace steps if we are like that now. thanks for sharing.
ReplyDeletebtw, how do I get your email addy? mine is okorofrances@gmail.com
need to send you a msg.
happy valentine.*smiles
Thanks a lot dearies!
ReplyDeleteIP92, you are very real too! That's one of the things I like about your blog.. Oh, you don't know the excitement I had when I read your post this morning! Like yayyyy! What a great way to start of my Valentine's day! El Sucre at work already :-) xx
My email addy is oneplustheone@gmail.com xx
and so I want to like your comment but there's no provision for it, ended up just saying it 'I like your comment'...lol
ReplyDeleteAwwwwww! It was fun meeting you. I won't lie or talk too much, you are beautiful. Glad you love your gift!
ReplyDeleteAwwwwww! It was fun meeting you. I won't lie or talk too much, you are beautiful. Glad you love your gift!
ReplyDeleteLol @Frances.. Saying it works too :-) xx
ReplyDelete@Ms J.S Bass, God bless you much beautiful woman *muah* xxx