Lettin' that bad bwoy go!

So one of my friends asked recently during a discussion how a 'young heart moves on from a broken relationship with someone who is not good for them or someone who is maltreating her but can't seem to move on'.

Now, I I'm not an expert on this topic (and I hope never to be by experience! Lol) but I thought I may just share some of the points that I have found personally helpful when it comes to going through that process.

The truth is that a number of us have gone through what is referred to as 'wrong love' syndrome and the worst part is when for some, after the relationship ends, you are unable to or find it difficult to let go or move on.

So here goes, suffering from a broken heart + 'wrong love' syndrome and want to move on / let go? Hope this helps:

1. You need to want to move on. You need to come to a place of understanding that the relationship is not good for you and not for you. If you keep thinking 'what if', moving on will be extra hard.

2. You need to believe that you are WORTH a good man. If you are happy to settle with someone who is not good enough or who will not treat / celebrate you as you ought, it will be difficult for you to move on.

3. You need to constantly affirm yourself as the lady that God has made you to be and believe it. Books / audio messages help a great deal. Listen to some Joyce Meyer / Pastor Bimbo Odukoya / T.D Jakes / Christian friends for some encouragement. You need to hear things to reassure you that your self-worth is not determined by any man or relationship... Remember faith comes by HEARING!... Hear the right things!

3. You need to try as much as possible to avoid the triggers that remind you of that relationship. Not a total cutting off (although that's necessary sometimes) but avoid those things that bring back memories of both of you being together, as much as possible. Then also stop texting/calling/fbooking (even if it's just to 'check on him' - yup we all know that line! lol). Let considerable time pass before you begin doing that again.

4. Now, the most important and helpful thing for me is the assurance that GOD gives of who I am in Him, how much He loves me, and how much He has invested in me. At this point, you need that closeness with Him, pray for strength from Him. Cry if you want to, but everyday until it happens, ask God for the grace to let go. It may not come immediately, it may seem like it's getting to you badddd but the wonderful thing about committing things to God is that He has a great way of turning bad situations into great testimonies.

He may not come back but there's a reason why that door is closed and in due time, you will see it. Trust your faithful Father in heaven and patiently wait. You will certainly see it and thank God for it.
If he is yours, he will come back but not on your terms or by sitting idle waiting for him to realise he's made a mistake, you have to move on with your life by God's grace and let/watch God move on your behalf.

I can certainly testify that no matter how bad it seems, when you look back on it, you will have much to thank God for. Trust Him, He has only the best will for you.

So my friend, let that bad bwoy go! xxxx

PS there's no text book answer or solution as each person is different so please feel free to share your helpful points :-) God bless you xxxx