Yesterday, I was chatting with a recently married colleague and she exclaimed at how great she feels cause she finally got a much needed cook at home!
I couldn't but share in her joy and enthusiasm as I know that one of my desires has been to have a cook when I get married.
Usually, when a woman hints that she cannot cook (especially in my African culture), there's almost pandemonium let loose (ok, slight exaggeration).. But honestly, you know that can be a big deal..
Don't get me wrong, I can cook (cross my heart!) but honestly, I think I may possibly enjoy life better if I had someone doing all my cooking for me.
When I used to nurse the thought of employing a cook within first year of marriage, and managed to voice it, I would be quickly hushed and told that it's a woman's role to look after the family and provide food for them.. Like "Even if your husband doesn't mind, what would your in-laws say? Perish the thought and enter that kitchen my friend!" *sigh*..
I have experienced chatting with a guy and the moment I kinda insinuated that it would not be a bad idea to have a cook in my home and I can literally see him counting the change from my bride price.... His eyes can't even mask it! lol
To be honest, I want to be a GREAT wife and mother and I am willing to pay the
So what are your thoughts? Having a cook, to be or not to be?
PS, I have searched high and low, wide and narrow, I am yet to find a verse in the bible that states that women are responsible for cooking and/or that forbids employing cooks.
PPS I promise to effectively manage and monitor the cook, I will even draw up the meal plan - it will be my pleasure! :-)
xxxx
If I've said it once. I've said it a million times. The Proverbs 31 woman has servants. So undoubtedly, one of them is a cook. "Proverbs 31 v 15 She gets up before daylight to prepare food for her family and for her servants."
ReplyDeleteThere's nothing in the bible saying wives must cook. But there's definitely a bible verse saying the ideal woman has servants!
unless of course, people are assuming that by preparing food for her servants, they think she's doing the cooking. that wouldn't make logical sense though because who cooks for their servants?
ReplyDeleteI definitely like the way your mind works!!
ReplyDelete@naijawife: yup,therz got to be a cook among those servants! *wide grin*
OMG!! Yes i want a cook too...and my husband better know how to cook too,not that Ill starve my children (lyk my mom says) but when I cook I want it to be super special :D
ReplyDeleteTHE FASHION ENGINEER
I'm so with the naija wife LOL
ReplyDeleteI still nurse the idea of a cook oh it's affordability reasons that hasn't made me employ one!! Because I'm sure my dear husband will not be willing to pay for the service and afterall he has bought an engagement ring and gotten a cook free!
Come oh, he didn't even buy me an engagement ring mcheeeeewwwwwwww
......if I ever voice this kain request...I am sure my mother-in-law will faint.........I don't mind cooking sha but I think I won't mind having a cook for those off days(those indomie days) ...I am a picky eater
ReplyDeleteLol. I certainly like the way your mind works but i've been looking forward to my own kitchen in my space and i don't like to share often #shrug
ReplyDelete@naijawife, You have just spoken words of wisdom right there! *Hi5* You have just added to my ammunition of supporting information.. merci beaucoup ma'am
ReplyDelete@Tamie, this train of thought has been on for so many years, I have only just found the courage to publicly come out of the closet :-)
@TFE, No good woman starves her husband and/or children.. The cook's timetable will b every detailed and monitored closely hehe
@fluffycutething, lol, plix we demand an engagement ring by God's grace.... And still in the attitude of prayer, we demand payment for cook too.
@Sykik, hahahaa.. I can imagine.. you can turn those 'off' days to a date with yoru husband and go out to eat.. Even if it's Mr Bigg's, make it romantic :-D
@Toin, that's lovely.. I admire women like you and I have prayed and aspired to love cooking so that I just enjoy this task but it has not happened and I have to confess that since I wrote this article, I have been filled with even more joy at the prospect of marriage! LOL..
PS, I like being invited to dinner oh *wink wink* xxxx
Well this is cool but as for me am a lil bit traditional when it comes to cooking for one's husband. I believe the woman should cook and if u have a man that can cook and does cook its a plus. So if want a maid, then it can be for other home chores bt certainly not cooking for my family. He/she can do the recipe shopping but not cooking. Everyone likes good food n i believe its makes a man feel good when his wife gives him good food n nt a maid. My opinion.
ReplyDeletehahaha! I want a man that can cook ohh! but I will cook too. in Canada, getting a cook / eating out everytime is expensive (I wouldn't)but I would love us to cook together (not my primary role) but for us both .. that's the man for me huuhh huh!
ReplyDeleteTo each their own I would say. But then the other thing killing us is Entitlement Mentality.
ReplyDeleteSome men think they are entitled to a wife that cooks, some women think they are entitled to a cook and servants. I say, cut ya coat according to ya size.
Biko Toin come and marry me, we will be cooking for each other
@Abi Tobi, it feels nice to have a man cook for you and I admire the fact that you enjoy cooking + I get you on cooks being expensive. This desire kinda went out the window when I was in the UK but now that I am back in the motherlan', I can dream again, yes? :-D xx
ReplyDelete@SNM, Thanks for commenting! I agree, entitlement mentality does make it seem more tedious.. To be honest, I am still praying to God for grace - if my husband would appreciate his wife cooking his meals.. (however I pray more that the hubby wouldn't mind having a cook :-D)
PS if you marry Toin, can I come and visit (very often?) lol
lol. I love this discussion. Every home is different and I don't believe in copying another home. some women just love cooking while others are not so crazy about it. Nothing wrong with either. The most important thing is to stay on top of things as a home maker. So if you have a cook, you inspect what goes into your family's tummy.
ReplyDeleteThank you ma'am! I totally agree with you *big grin*.. I will by no means neglect looking after my family, that would be my joy but I love the supervisory aspect of food production lol xx
ReplyDeleteFirst of all, there is no biblical basis for not having servants. if you want a cook, go for it.
ReplyDeleteWith that being said….
I could NEVER hire a cook. A housekeeper, sure but never a cook because I know how emotionally attached the hubster is to my cooking. When I cook for my man and feed him, not only is it gratifying for me, it speaks volumes ( certain things I can’t mention here…*wink* ) to him. Wanna hear my man speak in tongues? Watch me cook efo elegusi in a pair of hot pants. LOL!
@IN THE MIDST .. huh huuuh! preach lol
ReplyDelete@ITMoH, I lovee it! *May God help me!* xx
ReplyDelete