Waiting and Loving It!!! Feat Anwinli and Ohis Ojeikere

I met this beautiful couple a few weeks back through a wonderful mutual friend and I just fell in love with Anwinli! (sorry Ohis lol). We chatted like old friends, I grilled her like she was under FBI investigation and I learnt so much as well. I have to say that she is such a beautiful woman (love her dimples! :-D) and her beauty is not just external but there's a deeper beauty that shines through from a lovely heart - you just feel 'at home' with her - And she's married to a very wonderful man indeed.
I enjoyed watching them interact like old friends and it felt like they'd been married for donkey years (Their first weddng anniversary is on Sunday!)

They have a Youtube Channel 'The Winlos' where they post really funny and personal skits, with something to learn. Honestly, it's too cute!

I wouldn't say any further, please welcome today's Waiting and Loving It feature - Anwinli and Ohis Ojeikere.

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1 + The One: Hello Anwinli! Nice to have you here, could you please tell us about yourselves?

Ok here goes - Mr and Mrs Ohis Ojeikere or Mr and Mrs Anwinli Ohis Ojeikere met in Asaba in 2008 and were very close friends. We didn't have any 'emotional thingy' for each other. We were not even each others' choices. I wasn't his ideal woman physically as he wanted some 'obvious' things in a woman (I on the other hand, am very slim on all fronts lol). For me, he was too black and had these black lips that looked like that of a smoker LOL. And he wasn't fluent - Still not but has improved greatly. He went into relationships with others with the 'shape' he wanted, and me too with the toasters (suitors) that were coming, which didn't quite work out as something somehow was lacking in them. It's funny how we gist about it now.

Anyways, he heard strongly that what he was looking for was very close to him and that's mee - Anwinli :-) So March 7th, 2011, he asked me out. It was a bit shocking and I thought he was joking. He told me he was very serious and that he would want to marry me.
It was also funny because this guy was really a broke dude then hahaha

Well, to be honest, I didn't pray much about it. I had known him so well. He had the 'majors' in my list, especially the God-factor. I chilled a bit for a week (so as not to look 'easy' :-D) and said yes to him on the 13th of March, 2011. We got married on the 18th of May, 2013.

We would have gotten married sooner (2012) but I held on to pursue a Masters' degree in Ghana.That's the summary of me and my Bridegroom, my mentor!

1 + The One: Wow! Thank you for that very detailed introduction! So when he asked you out, did you have that 'emotional thingy', because you didn't when you first met.

             

When he asked me out, I felt 'something' a bit, especially when he hugged me but it was just there jare because I was still looking at the black lips - like "Could I kiss this guy for real?" I just had mixed feelings about it. But it didn't take so long before I started being attracted to him. I had to help him as well to 'get me' by telling him things I knew would appeal to me, for instance I suggested that he referred to me using a term of endearment. He started calling me 'Sweetheart' - that had the opposite effect, as for me it was a turn off! Hahaha

So I told him I would prefer he referred to me as 'Baby'. Anyways, the guy tried in being romantic. His voice was so soft overnight! I was so surprised with the new vocal range haha

So the straight answer is: I didn't feel the emotional thingy immediately.

1 + The One: But it developed?

It developed very fast!

         

1 + The One: Did you get scared initially that the physical attraction may never come? 

Nah, I wasn't scared at all. The day he asked me out, I said even if this guy has black lips, he's got a good height and I like his muscles too :-D That's one of the things that I liked in a guy (a nice build), and thank God his nice body still 'gets me' today! *cheeky grin* lol.
I have to also add that I felt a very strong peace about him.

          

1 + The One: Lol... So with all the attraction going on with his muscles and stuff, what made you both make the decision to wait?

One of the visions or should I say purpose or goal in our relationship was to be role models. We wanted our relationship to be a standard - so that kept us, beside the fear of God. For everytime we felt like it, we would always remind ourselves about our purpose so that kept us waiting.

1 + The One: ..So you understood that your relationship had a purpose, that's wonderful. Were there things you did or avoided to ensure that you did not compromise?

Yes. We tried as much as much as possible to keep it open - no hanging out at hotels and private places. Most importantly, we always talked about how we were feeling. Whether it be our telephone conversations or in person, openess was the key and we found out that killed or melted the urge.

Also, if you are struggling, pray and be open before God for strength in moments like that and HIS STRENGTH will show forth somehow. We had our struggling moments too.

             

In addition, I must mention that we had mentors (and still do till now) who would check on us from time to time. They were there to help evaluate our relationship.
So besides God, you may need mentors you can trust to open up to when you are struggling so that they can give you the best advice.

Waiting was very important to us because it meant we loved ourselves enough to do so and felt fresh in God's presence - nothing to be ashamed of. Waiting makes you feel proud, preserved and free without being condemned in your hearts. I like the fact that my man is able to publicly affirm me a lot, saying that the way we handled our relationship makes him trust me easily and hold me in high regard as having principles.

1 + The One: Thank God for that! I love that you said that openess is key. Do you have any thoughts or advice about marriage after 12months in?

Friendship is important in marriage. Communication is key. If you become friends, or are friends with the person you marry it becomes sweet and easier because you know each other really well. In the case of my hubby and I, everything I have seen so far in him and him in me is no different from the things we knew about ourselves before we even started a relationship, and before we got married. Also, my hubby and I communicate about everything - we are so expressive, especially my hubby - Gosh!!!!! He is so very open.
Openess eases a lot in marriage. It's so much work but easy when dealing with an expressive friend.

For a woman, you must be sure that what he tells you is safe with you and you won't condemn him or remind him of his past, because many of us could be 'past-oriented' which can be very hurtful to a man and can kill him being open with you.

Be a home for your man, he will always long to, and look forward to coming back home.

Lastly, it is important to be a strong intercessor, your home will need it. As a couple we check on each other on things that have to do with our spiritual lives - Especially as a wife to my husband, because I realise that he can get very busy and decline a bit - so he's on my watch and vice versa.

I gatchu babe!

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Again and again in the Waiting and Loving It feature, one common theme is honesty, openess and communication (or is that 3?) required to make any relationship work. Don't just assume that they know, talk about it. Talk about your convictions, your values, your plans and your struggles. It may surprise you how much more understanding and strength you could draw from each other.

Also, like Anwinli mentioned, as much as possible, be accountable to someone or some people (prefarably older or more experienced). It helps you a lot! You don't have to tell them every detail of your relationship, that's private, but you can share general struggles and temptations in order to receive good counsel. The bible says there is safety in the multitude of counsel. Don't keep quiet about it - Be honest with yourself, talk to God about it and share with your partner. May God help us all.

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Like I mentioned earlier, the Ojeikeres have a fantastic and very cutee Youtube channel where they post funny, entertaining and enlightening skits on different topics particularly around married life and relationships! I have really enjoyed watching them, I'm sure you would love it too! I have posted a few of my favourites below and you can watch more on their Youtube Channel and follow them on Facebook too!

Youtube: The Winlos

Facebook: /thewinlos

What Every Woman Wants in a Man

Faith Kills: Don't Kill Yourself

Please click HERE for other Waiting and Loving It Couples!

Do you have any question, please do not hesitate to ask!
Email - oneplustheone@gmail.com

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